Sick of people telling me there will be monsters and deep dark caverns of doom if I kill myself. That’s a pile of horseshit. Not a single one of you know what happens after death and I don’t give a fuck for any opinions based on nothing but your own twisted imaginations. You think there is nothingness? Good for you. You might be in for a surprise.
Off anti-psychotics, I can see things clearly. Life is a never-ending circle of betrayal, shallow people, and morons complaining about ‘oh today I got a bad grade or he/she doesn’t like me.’ Get over yourself. There are people with real problems in this world. Do you have any idea what’s its like to hear voices talking to you all the fucking time telling you things you should and shouldn’t do? Or feeling deep burning hate because you are able to see inside people’s souls and see how false they are? Stop caring what people think about you. Too many people trying to follow the tribe, trying to ‘fit in’ with a certain group of people and selling themselves out when the truth is.. the tribe doesn’t give a shit.
Every single person on this godforsaken planet is too busy caring about their own selves. Have any of you tried doing something for someone else without wanting anything in return? ” A true measure of a man’s character is a) how he treats those who are of no use to him and b) how he treats someone who can’t fight back.” Try doing something for humanity other than wallowing in self-pity all day. It might actually make you feel worthwhile.
As for me, the pain is just too much. I’m gonna be 27 soon, I have never had real friends, my mind is too demented to hold down a job which means I can’t support myself, guys have treated me badly, nobody gives a damn about me and I have a delightful cocktail of mental disorders including A.D.D , bipolar and borderline personality disorder which basically means I have no chances at a normal life in this world. Now many of you here have very serious problems and I understand why you want to die. If you really see no way out, and have considered all other possible options, then I wish you peace. And you WILL find peace, one way or another. But to all the people who just come here to whine about things especially when they have a husaband/wife/ girlfriend or boyfriend just piss me off.
What am I waiting for? Well it’s simple.. the only reason I’m still alive is because of my brother. He’s the only one in my family who knows how serious I am about wanting to leave this world and he has tried very hard to help me. I don’t want him to live with the burden of knowing his only sibling died by her own hand.
But eventually the pain will outweigh everything else. Without love, I am dead. My heart is already dead. I will ride into glory and perish in the fire that never stops burning, I shall close my eyes forever and never wake up. I have the means for a quick and painless way out. HELL YEA.
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Sorry I am not capable to give love as such, of air is my obstructed heart, and so much more. Hmm. I hope that LovingLife guy is alright……………………………………… he was such a lovable guy. I guess it’s true what they say… Farewell, brother.
You still around?
@DeathDreamer – You’re definitely too cool to perish, please stick around. You’re brother sounds very cool, too. How does he help you, how old is he? Do you ever work out, try hitting the gym and those cardio machines, it’s good stamina. It’s good to hear that you have a brother by your side like that. Mine lives across an ocean away, he got deported and banished from the States, back to Westcoast of France. Now he’s working 12 hours a day just like he wanted. He was in re-occurring getting locked up in jail for like and overall of 5 years, I think more. He’s been out since a year or two now. You should go play Elder Scrolls Online with your brother.
an evidence-based hypothesis is not the same as a solely-twisted-imagination-based assertion.
If there is zero evidence of god, afterlife, heaven or hell (and there isn’t), then it is absurd to insist on believing these things exist.
IMO, reincarnation without any memory of the past, is the only other reasonable estimation of what could happen after death. It’s either nothing, or it’s like being a completely new thing, completely separate from the previous thing… which is how i arrived at my alternative-to-nothingness idea that “we are all the same entity, uniquely and separately incarnated across a spectrum of possibilities.” Do i “believe” that’s true? No. But i don’t insist it isn’t, or can’t be, either. It’s just that such an idea is not based on “evidence,” but rather, the lack thereof… and seasoned with some metaphysical, science-y imagination.
The least “imagination-based” estimation of after-death, is nothingness. It is the most evidenced possibility; simply due to the fact that there is zero valid evidence to indicate that any living entity has ever “returned.” Has that entity gone on to some other inconceivable world? Who knows. But we can be reasonably certain they do not return to earth in any recognizable form, which is essentially identical to “there is nothing after death.” Even if we are reincarnated, the few people who claim to recall past lives, have zero way of substantiating their claims, and are often found to be incorrect in the vast majority of those claims. If they happen to make a 15% correct guess about factors of their alleged prior existence… they are still 85% wrong, and in science, that’s not nearly enough to be considered valid. Most of the time, it’s not even close to 15% accurate; more like “completely inaccurate, if accounting for margin of error, and necessarily deemed false.”
You seem to be emphatically irate about people being “selfish” or “self-serving” or… well, how can you expect anyone (or more importantly “everyone”) to prioritize the rest of the world’s assholes over themselves?
Expecting others to support you is a mistake, and an irrationally excessive expectation; those people are busy trying to navigate their own shit-storms, and survive their own other-people-induced crises.
We all have a limited amount of time and energy, and most of us already have too much “on our plates,” aka “too much to deal with all the time.” Most of us do not have discretionary time, energy and material resources to just go around being philanthropic and infinitely charitable… especially since so many of all those “other people” out there, are total jerks, sadists, sociopaths, etc. Why would i want to help anyone who obstructs me or is incapable of empathy, or simply chooses to disregard my well-being? I wouldn’t, and i won’t.
I saw a quote somewhere, recently, and i don’t recall where or who… but it was something like “i don’t let people rent space in my head; they never pay for it anyway.”
“Every single person on this godforsaken planet is too busy caring about their own selves.”
1) not me
2) if i don’t prioritize myself, who will?
3) why is it anyone else’s responsibility to make sure i’m okay? I don’t think it is.
4) i don’t even have enough resources for myself (time/energy/money); how can anyone reasonably expect me to give away all my resources to people who won’t help me in return? I would gladly engage in a mutually beneficial symbiosis with just about any compatible person. But i’ve never met one. And i have my doubts about whether i could ever offer a positive overall result to anyone… and i’m almost completely certain that not only would have to be “profitable,” but i would have to have a reliable way to maintain an ever increasing surplus of money which i hate, in order to impress the shallow sociopathic cunts who are now patting themselves on the back and high-fiving each other for being as blatantly disgusting as possible, and then pretending that’s how things should be, and that i’m some kind of “misogynist” for finding that reprehensible.
And, heh… if you think your heart is already dead… how can you expect to find love? But that can’t be a true statement, because if your heart was dead, you’d be “numb” and would not care that none of those people you think are so disgusting, will love you. Why would you want any of those people’s affection or attention? Maybe they’re not quite as disgusting as your despair colors them. Maybe your interpretation needs adjustment (though i’m not saying it’s entirely inaccurate either; much of what you’re saying is justified… even if it’s a misinterpretation, i can see how someone would think those things, and i can’t blame you because i see the same indications, and have thought similarly, many times… but then i decided to be fair to everyone, and question myself, to make sure i’m not just mistaking; more people should do that).
One of my issues is that “me” isn’t what i want to kill; i just can’t see a feasible way to prevent all those other fuckers out there from continuing to perpetuate all the disgusting injustice, which maintains the world as a disgusting place. I want myself and this world and all it’s inhabitants to find a way to coexist and thrive together… but too many people are obstructing that, some intentionally, because they benefit from generating conflict and oppressing the majority of the population, including most non-human animals.
I can’t seem to do the right things to change it, and i’m tired of suffering. I don’t “want” to die… and i get extremely depressed when i feel that i will have to, because this life in this world seems like a lost cause, to me… even though i’m pretty sure it’s the only one i’ll ever get. The idea that i’ll have to sacrifice everything, because of other people’s bullshit, just makes me sick; so sick that i’d rather die than feel that way most of the time… even though i really would prefer to not die.
But, you know… “half a loaf is better than no bread.”
Trying to integrate with the tribe, isn’t about whether the tribe “cares” about you… it’s about access to the benefits of a cooperative society. Most people who are trying to fit in with such a society, also don’t really care about that society, but rather, feel they require its benefits. In other words: they need a host upon which to leech, and that host is “society.”
That’s how, and why, people get “hookups” and special favors and privileges, and end up holding positions of power and status, for which they are woefully unqualified; like all judges and law enforcement personnel, for example. All of those who violently impose harmful conditions upon others, based on illegitimate laws, which were only implemented due to illegal subversion of due process, bribery, perjury… all of them are evil tyrants and terrorists, and they go around acting like getting paid to ruin people’s lives, is justified by the fact that they’re paid to do so, while denying that same reasoning to anyone they deem “the enemy.” It’s fucked.
I would love to believe that those types of people can be reasoned with, but… it seems violence, force, is the only thing they care to understand.
When a tyrant holds power, it is never surrendered willingly. Never.
People equate the reward system of their brain lighting up with ‘good’ when they receive money for whatever job it is they’re employed to perform, regardless of the harm and negative repercussions they could possibly cause, albiet they fail to recognize their astonishing one sidedness when the same poor, miserable fate befalls them… lol, the world is a sad place, a sad, stupid place.
Lol.
…Why do you think judges are called ‘judges’ clevername?
That’s the implication to accept that you’ve lost already “I’m better than you.” so to speak.
Heh, it’s pretty discouraging. But isn’t it a bit fallacious to assume that everyone should escape the enevitability of either ‘winning’ or ‘losing’ simply due to human standards? Nature is unsympathetic. The universe isn’t inhospitable nor is it charitable- it’s indifferent.
Expecting the universe around us to miraculously bend to our convenience is incredibly narcissistic, if not in the least bit childish and fantastical, fostering self entitled thinking, not to mention it’s lazy.
Then again, where to draw the line between the concept of laziness and using our intelligence to create things to make our lives and general existence more convenient? And manipulating as well as taking advantage of situations for our own furthering could also be considered a fundamental, key aspect of intelligence, human intelligence beyond animal intelligence in so much as in the fact that we can can manipulate our enviroment to such a severe degree as to have an effect over the entire planets ecosystem as well as locally, in our own communities.
An intelligence of such a severe level is simply astounding, to be able to alter the very surface of the earth is remarkable, I think woth that in mind we simply need to learn to ba able to control the vast power of our minds more efficiently, and not just in destructive, uncreative ways. Considering this, it’s no wonder safeguards are out in place to, to an extension, ‘control’ people’ , as without a force of guidance we’d be lost. Peopla can’t simply be born with th3 blueprints of governments pre established in their minds. Humans simply don’t live long enough to take the mistake we’ve made and learn from them, we live long enough lives to cower in fear of our intrinsic (only in a contemporary sense), flawed systems collapsing along with the arguably (clearly…) more intrinsic ‘threat’ of facing our own mortality. In a word, we’re ‘humans’ first, and ‘people’ second, not the other way around, as people like to insinuate and propagate nearly endlessly. Our faces are burned into us as we age, making our cultural identity in some way a part of us no matter what is said, though the truth is we first had to be what we were in order to be what we ‘are’, or say we are, or try to be. However it isn’t exactly considered cathartic to (have to) come to terms with this truth, (which makes me wonder if we made an evolutionary wrong turn somewhere along the road) that we had to build on those things to reach here, wherever here currently is. I think it’s illogical and a kind of preposterous way of thinking that no one should be a t an advantage or at a disadvantage… if we don’t represent humanity, who will, we’re naturally inclined to be self centered and biased, it’s delusional or wishful thinking to believe otherwise, wanting other people to be just that, in a way seems like a projection of an enlarged sense of self to me, never realizing that all the others out there ane thinking and hoping the same things about you, and everyone else just as well as you, we all are… it’s astonishing the more we try to connect with other peopke the farther away we sometimes seem to be from the goal. Your body implores you and your mind screams, “Why?” yet it doesn’t seem to make a difference. I guess we just can’t all meld our conscious together yet… which seems like a bad idea anyway on so many levels, but … lol.
People are always going to be judged, the more you consider it, the more you consider anything, it just leaves it open to indefinite obsurity. No wonder people are close minded, as a defence mechanism…
“It pays to keep an open mind, but not so open that your brains fall out.”
– Carl Sagan
-.- Lol, once again my paragraph spacing is entirely horrible and nearly forgotten about entirely… I’m typing this on a tablet so the keyboard is small and my posts are full of spelling errors…
Heh, for some reason that wall of text made my brain feel like a sliding tiles puzzle… i’ll try again to give it a real read, in another few minutes or so. x)
x( x( urrrmm! I have aspergers… that’s how I think, too fast to articulate patiently what it is I’m trying to say because it should be obvious! Lol, but I know that’s not the way things work.
I get so lost in thought I dont pay attention to anything else, I try to abstain from perfectionism because it causes me anxiety, but it seems to be the only thing that keeps me focused, and not indulging in it cause other anxiety to arise… so by my trying not to be obsessive, my post became atrocious. It’s like my mind is in hyperbole sometimes…
I’m typing my posts on an android too small for my long fingers and it’s giving me cramps, plus my perfection anxiety has caused me to chew my thumbnails down by at least a centimeter that I’m pretty sure is never going to grow back, so typing on my tablets’ screen is kind of like that nails on a chalkboard feeling.
Urgh! This is killing me! I’m either impeded by ‘No, that isn’t just perfect’ or I try to get past that and then I do everything sloppily… perfectionism is like a form of masochism, it’s humiliating and unbearable.
I’d post from my laptop because it would be easier, but I forgot my password and I’m only logged in on my tablet because I have SP set to keep me logged, so I guess I’m doomed. ):
And my above post is so terrible and riddled with errors it just makes me want to go crawl under a rock.
It’s not entirely your wall of text’s fault. My glasses have been strangely super annoying lately, and i haven’t been wearing them. Though i suppose the resulting squinting and decreased reading efficiency kinda cancels out the benefit of removing the other annoyance.
And, like lorax mentioned with the lab coat placebo effect thing, i’m pretty sure squinting does something similar. Or maybe it’s an illusion, generated by the fact that i have to try harder to “matrix” what i’m seeing, so i’m spending more energy, less efficiently, which “feels like” being more focused, when i’m probably actually reducing the effectiveness of focus, spending more energy faster, to do the same thing slightly less uncomfortably. <.<
@clevername you’re awesome. You should work in politics then maybe the system would make sense for once
Thanks. I grinned and giggled. 🙂
“Do you have any idea what’s its like to […] [feel] deep burning hate because you are able to see inside people’s souls and see how false they are?”
There is good in everyone, too. The problem is that often times people become, to us, what we project of them in our minds. If we expect the worst from them and they know this, they’ll be what we expect.
If you want people to be kind to you, you have to know that it’s a two-way street. The way you treat others will reflect on you. There are still cruel people out there who will never really give a shit and just want to hurt others, but the majority are struggling just like you. If you see someone as an enemy, they’ll turn into your enemy. Simple. So if you want to have better luck you have to be kind and make an effort. It’s hard to hate somebody who genuinely likes you. There are lonely misanthropic folk out there, just like you. If you can show them that you believe they are special, and that despite their flaws they’re still awesome in their own way, and believe this of yourself just as much… you might be able to escape this trap of self-hatred and hatred of the world – the world that is a projection in your mind.
The trick is to become a balanced mixture of realist, optimist, and pessimist. If you can do this you can try to think logically and *decide* what’s the appropriate course of action in any circumstance. You won’t be blinded by negativity nor naive goodwill. There’s no totally escaping the biases implemented within all of us, but one can attempt to see above and beyond.
Yeh. If there was a way to condense everything I’ve wanted to get across to people, it would be this. We are all responsible for how we act, even more than we think sometimes. If your role is that of a teacher you have an obligation to your student as much as they have one to you. Same goes for love, life, work, all of it. The solution to all problems should start in the mirror, because when guilt and the mechanisms for processing accountability are lost everyone loses. It’s what you make of it and how much of yourself you give away.
“If you see someone as an enemy, they’ll turn into your enemy. Simple.”
Why doesn’t this doesn’t work the other way?
I mean… i can’t just “see [insert 10/10 supermodel] as my lover” and she’ll just turn into that… but i’m pretty sure if i chose to see her as my enemy, i might feel as though she were, without even meeting her… and if i did meet her, and saw her as an enemy, she’d most likely act like one. But if i meet her and “see her as my lover,” she’d most likely still treat me like her enemy (lol).
Enemies are easy to make. It’s easy to make someone hate you (minus e.g. Buddhists), but if you’ve ever tried to make someone love you… pretty much only Buddhists would (but not because you made them). And most likely not in the way you’d want. 😛
@Fro-:
“In the end, more than they wanted freedom, they wanted security. They wanted a comfortable life, and they lost it all — security, comfort, and freedom. When … the freedom they wished for was freedom from responsibility, then Athens ceased to be free.” — Sir Edward Gibbon
CN IS THE WISEST PERSON ON THE PLANET
I think Einstein was a pretty wise person.
shhhhh
lol, I meant to post this to thepainiskillingme^ but it appeared under your post, but the context that leaves it in is pretty funny as well^^
Right, he said “is” not “was”. My bad.