I am writing this with a heavy heart. It’s been awhile. I’d just go straight to my point, yeah?
Did you actually miss me? Because I know I don’t.
As time goes by, I find that I have lesser and lesser things to tell you about. I actually struggle to talk to you. I don’t even know what to say to you sometimes. In order to keep This alive, I’ve tried my best to push myself out to talk to you, and so I always send you pictures. Since they speak of a thousand (make that million!) words, ha ha.
The love I once had for you is sort of…Fading away? I don’t even think much of you. Sad to say, you’re not on my priority list anymore.
The lyrics of “November Rain” suddenly seems so applicable in this situation.
I’m guessing you didn’t wanted to know this. But I had to. Since you’re being involved in it as well.
I remember you saying, that “Nothing lasts forever, things can only last long enough”.
I guess you’re right.
I’m so sorry. Thank you for everything. I know it ain’t easy for you, dealing with a mad woman I was.
You’re still in my heart though. But the feelings I have for you are not the same anymore.
I’m sorry.
Sorry.
All the best for your future.
sorry. and thank you.
I’ve changed. and so has This.
-MNQX
3 comments
Do you feel better now that things are changing? Is it less stressful? Or would you go back to the way things were if you could?
Hmm…are you writing to someone or people here on Suicide Project? Here’s a Mary Oliver quote which came to me when i read your message:
To live in this world, you must be able to do three things:
to love what is mortal;
to hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it;
and, when the time comes to let it go, to let it go.
Dear Randall,
Thank you for the Mary Oliver quote. It is so true, but also so hard to do. I did love someone mortal, and i loved that to death, and i let it go because that was for his interest. But it still hurts, very painful.