What’s at the End? How Far, how High, or how Low does it Go?

We are all born, for the most part, knowing absolutely nothing about where we are or why we came into existence.  When we grow old enough, we eventually learn of the inevitable mortality we will all face; we all discover there is an end to life.  Sometimes, I go to sleep and wake up wondering what’s after all of this existence.  I grew up living within the structure of a Christian denomination, which presents the possibility of ending up in either Heaven or Hell, depending on how unjust or just of a life I lead.  On the flip side, as I’m sure many have, I grew up learning, understanding, and trying to grasp concepts dubbed as laws with tangible applications; much like the Law of Conservation of Energy, which indicates that energy can neither be created nor destroyed, but conserved to change form over time, etc, etc, etc.

I eventually matured, evolved, or devolved beyond the confines of thinking in terms of Heaven or Hell, and came to understand, through a combination of education and experience, that, no matter how you try to define the eventual end of life, if it’s constantly changing and evolving into something different as it occurs, you can never truly know it’s end value beyond what you can let yourself perceive.  And, in every case, your perception does not end, it continues within what you can perceive and believe to be real as you remain alive.

Unless, of course, you entertain the notion of blind faith being a form of truth that guides your grounding in reality.  I must admit, when I was a bit more young and naive, I took this to heart literally, and did not discover, until later in life, that blind faith was simply a means to guide my moral compass, or conscience, into seeing the best quality in things or people.  It felt like, to me, to take truth without a grain of salt; to take truth without doubt; to accept what you cannot perceive or certainly believe to be real.

Although it is mostly speculation and, maybe a bit of wishful thinking, I want my physical end to be me going out fighting, or doing something daring and heroic, like foiling a bank robbery, saving innocent lives’ and dying of a bullet wound in the process; or going through a tragic accident, like a parachute failing to deploy in the middle of a skydive; or going on a mission to Mars, not coming back, and being one of, if not, the first human beings to perish on Mars; or going out in peace, like passing on during a beautiful dream, where everything I ever wished for comes true, and I never have to wake up from that dream, perhaps dubbing this my Heaven or evolution during and after the end of my life.  That’s how I want to perceive my many ways my life can, and may not end, even if there is a bit of practical understanding and blind faith in each of those visions.

But can you really live blindly, without doubts to judge truth in anything perceived?  Can you truly understand the end if you make yourself blind?  And can you truly accept your tangible perception of reality when it does not continue through and beyond the end, after what you know as your physical self dies and withers away into oblivion?  I think about it from time to time, but, one thing is always constant, if I am not alive to perceive the end, where and when I understand my perception may stop, whether through blind faith or through more tangible, or practical applications, what the heck is at the end or beyond the end of life?  With that said, I’m not sure if I should or should not be worried about the whole who, what, where, when, why, and how of the end of my life, if I can’t live and see myself die and witness the aftermath of my own demise.