I am in my late twenties and feeling that there is no longer any hope. I been depressed since i was 16 and attemted only once. I seem to go through stages of being ok and relativley happy to the darkest place you can think of.
The last month i have been thinking about going on a daily basis the only think stopping me is the pain of going, some people might say you wouldnt care about that if you really want to do it, however no one wants to feel pain thats why i want the easiest way to do it.
I have massive debt, no job or prospects, i cant enjoy anything, no interest in anything, barely able to get out of bed, not eating and i cant see any way as this feeling is a constant in my life.
How do people cope if they choose to stay?
3 comments
For me it’s just getting through each day as it comes, I find no point in looking to far into the future let alone make plans, just try to hold onto the few small things in my life. I go through feeling relatively ok to feeling, as you say, in a dark place, I have to talk to cope. You’re right when you say no one wants pain, and also worries about failure when they try, if I had a pill that would painlessly exit me I’m sure I’d take it, but we don’t so have to keep going. I’m sorry you have these problems, that life’s so hard for you, there’s no easy answer, just saying, you are not alone with these feelings, to know others care, others hope you keep going.
I appreciate the reply. I too would take the pill if one exists or any form of painless way. But your right thats our instincts kicking in so we dont do “silly” things. I am trying to live more hour by hour currently as the thought of tomorrow is to painful to think about. There are probably people in worse situations than me in terms of support etc but that doesnt matter as its all relevant s i try not to tell people what im feeling as they either dont know what to say or the classic “just shake it off you will be fine”. But until i get the balls to do anything or find a painless way i have no choice.
I’ve thought about suicide since I was 18. I attempted once. I’m 63 now and still think about suicide most days. The easiest way to end this life, I’ve found, is to get up every morning and go to bed every night and don’t think about it too much. “Day by day life’s a cinch. Yard by yard life is hard.” I look back at all the years between 18 and 63 and laugh. It’s like the snap of a finger…gone. I’ve got maybe 15 – 20 years left before checking out and I’m sure the years will slip by like a lightening flash.