Be strong and be the best person you can be. No one can ask any more of you. It’s alot easier to place blame than it is to forgive. Learning to forgive others is what takes true strength. Also, and most important of all, learn to be able to forgive yourself. Im such a preachy douche, lol.
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These principals are what everyone should strive to achieve, to become the best person they can be and developing the ability to forgive others and yourself. I agree, forgiving yourself is fundamental, as every action you make is through the medium of yourself. If you cannot forgive yourself you incapacitate yourself from doing anything else
so when are you going to get around to forgiving yourself, and i. you hypocrite
I think you’re on the right track, there. 🙂
In some parts of the world people have seen their entire family shot dead in front of their eyes. Do you think they should forgive and forget, let bygones be bygones and all. It’s easy for us to say that when it’s not us but they reality that nobody want’s to admit is those people don’t matter. All that matters is what makes us feel good.
Why would those people not matter? I don’t think pining away and/or feeling impotent about all the problems in the world will help them much more than trying to improve one’s life in the here-and-now, where some sort of difference can be made. Lest anyone forget, the first world is just as rife with violence, severe drug addiction and prostitution, which are arguably just as destructive as armed militias elsewhere in the world. And yes, forgive and forget is the best way through that cesspit, while doing what you can to save what’s salvageable.
It’s just my opinion that I think people care but the have their limits. It’s all well and good for people here to say things like forgive and forget like all the other advice but it’s not on your door step. I gave the most powerful example; people in western countries also experience horrific things. It seems to me that you get a lot of this self indulging advice but if it was in their own backyard we might get different advice.
For the record, my stating that I’m a “preachy douche”, was my attempt at acknowledging the self indulgent nature of my post. That’s kind of the point of posting things online. Also, even though my words are obviously not directly applicable to everyone’s problems, through interpretation I feel they can apply to anyone that finds them helpful. You sound hella smart though and I appreciate your comments.
No, I think your advice is applicable. I’m sorry for always seeing the worst in everything. It’s difficult to find that strength in an environment where you can never be free and happy. Defenceless against what’s lurking.
Ya, I hear ya, it feels impossible to not see the bad side to everything. Alot of what I say is more so what I think people want to hear, or what might help someone;even if I don’t actually mean it. This post for example, while forgiveness is important there’s people that I would just tell to fuck off. I just got into a fist fight with my homie and I sure as shit have’nt forgiven him. I’m just really fake and full of hot air lol.
@TTD: I grew up with all of the examples I gave. To boot: narcissistic step father who sexually abused children; he fits into the severe drug category as he was addicted to crack. But all in all, I do know where you’re coming from and tend to agree that the wishy-washy positive thinking nonsense is masturbatory at best. Change requires action, and action always comes with doubt. It’s never an easy gambit.
Yep, I know and your a special person. I’ve probably read hundreds of posts on here from people who have been treated like no person should. For some people forgiveness is an important process in moving on. I don’t think it’s right that people should feel so weak as to forgive and ultimately condone their suffering. If society can’t give them justice or revenge it should at least satisfy them in a way other than forgiveness.
Some people don’t deserve forgiveness. Trust me, I know.
Society is a stupid amalgamation of people who, in many cases, have no first-hand knowledge of those situations. They don’t really know any better unless the media’s doing a good job covering the issues. But it’s never about condoning one’s suffering. It’s about acknowledging that it happened, and that it no longer has any sway over you. Choosing to be a better person than the people you’ve experienced in life – the ones who showed you how /not/ to live.
I sometimes wonder if Hitler just before he was about to shoot himself in his bunker decided to get on the internet and make a quick post on the suicide project what advice would he get? Would they tell him to change his moustache, would they try and help him? would he get hate? I don’t know.
If someone has been left with a lasting reminder or has been permanently affected, your right. They should regain control but it’s very difficult without help. I just want those people to know I understand exactly.
@The Trap Door: Are you really asking if people would give supportive advice to a guy whose entire personality was defined by hateful diatribes and angry, nearly incoherent vitriol? No, I’m pretty sure he’d be banned after making his first post if SP existed in his lifetime and he decided to try his luck here.
Trap door raises an interesting point. This site is filled with amoral and unethical people, as well as the good ones. Because people are socially conditioned to sympathise with unhappy people, they are unable to distinguish between the nice people and the people who are just jerks, so the end result is blind acquiessance. If hitler posted on this site, he would likely get firstly a bunch of people telling him not to take the cyanide, and secondly, a lengthy lecture about the rules of the site prohibiting discussions of methods