what happens after the end?
I have been suicidal since I can remember. The only thing that has stopped me from attempting (in recent years) is the fear of what will happen after I catch the bus. What if I am successful in my endeavor, only to end up in the same position again?
I have the means. I have the will. Now I just need the courage to take my final step.
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I was wondering about this recently. I honestly think it doesn’t matter what’s next, it’s either something different or nothing at all.
Ever watch the movie Ground Hog Day?
Funnily enough, it was on tv today…
Our strength is our pain- facing it takes huge amount of strength that can be used in other capacities. I truly believe we are stronger than we know.
I’m sorry you’re hurting to the point of hurting you. 🙁 The only hope is hope itself. Keep reaching out here and other ways to fight your way through these feelings.
I think if our spirit does live on, and I truly believe it does, we might be someplace else observing our loved ones and what happens next to them… as well as facing a worse situation for ourselves due to our own actions.
I don’t know if I AM hurting, and I wonder if that is part of the problem. I don’t feel anything. I’m not sure what is worse – the endless pain and angst of deep depression, or the empty space of a medicated mind. At least when there is pain, there is something to push against.
Is the courage in dying, or in living?