It makes me upset when I, or others post about things that are bothering us and are kicked around by some hateful comments. I hate that. For example, “Try living my life for one damn day I don’t cry about it on some shitty website 24/7 for attention. Get over your lesbian self harming self.”. We just need to vent. If people really are on here because they consider being miserable some sort of giant competition, what do you possibly gain out of it? I’m just on here to vent when I feel really shitty. I should find a different forum. This is so childish.
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I haven’t been on here in years, but it seemed like there was always one guy setting out to be a douche or to make things a competition. My thoughts have always been that I have plenty of reasons to be depressed, but the only one that matters is the actual major depressive disorder. And that’s all I care about in suffering. I’ve met happy people with shitty lives and people born to great lives that can’t enjoy one second of them due to depression. Competition is pointless, we should be the best support group possible for each other since we all know what depression and the contemplation of suicide feels like instead of trying to determine some stupid ranking system.
I wonder about that as well. This is a sharing/support website. Obviously not everyone is the same and different life events will affect people in different ways, and we all should be more aware of that. Every circumstance that causes pain is valid, and should be treated with the respect the person deserves.
As you say it’s not a competition, but sadly some people think that they must validate their pain by doing a pissing contest (can’t think of any other way to describe it, sorry). I think the best one can do is disregard those comments and make use of the good/caring ones, because there’s always going to be some that don’t understand (everywhere, even outside SP).
On the other hand it could also be that the people that does that is doing the same you are (venting). I’d say it’s really not the way to do so but well… different strokes for different people i guess.
I agree with you nameless. Everyone here has problems, has their struggles that they’re obviously not able to get over (or we wouldn’t be on this website would we…).
I think the Mf is right, and that a lot of the people who try to compare are doing so to try to make themselves feel better, more justified in some way. But I totally agree with you when you say that it shouldn’t be done, and that it shouldn’t be allowed, because in the end it helps no one.
It certainly doesn’t help the people who needed to vent or to talk to someone, and it doesn’t help the person making the comments because they need to learn another way to cope.
I wish that the world were more perfect, but it’s not, so the site is still gonna have those shitbags that we wish we didn’t have to hear from, but there’s not too much we can do (which is why I hardly bother posting most of the time). But know that most people on here genuinely just want to listen and help or accept whoever needs to vent, and that whatever someone may post about their life being harder is just a load of bull. It’s all subjective, you can hardly learn about how someone’s mind works just by reading about their post (maybe their circumstances), but no one can know how hard it is for each person to live their life besides that person themself….
I’ve been noticing this trend more recently.
I have been compelled to leave a few comments on these posts but deleted them because people are entitled to their opinions and should have room to vent during a time they need less opposition.
But ya, the pissing contests are swaying me more and more away from this site.
I’m kinda glad you noticed this. Some people seem to adore the BS some people spew here.
The problem is we live in a society that turns “everything” into a competition. From our earliest childhood we are weighed, measured, rated, graded, assessed. We keep score on everything. Everything we do is evaluated and compared to how well everyone else does. Our self esteem is based on these comparisons on our ability to find areas in which we excel. In which we are better than others and above average. Its all about ego and pride. Even to the point of wanting to be the “best” at negative things. Like they are bragging about how bad they have it and how no one else could have survived living their life. It probably makes them feel stronger or tougher to make disparaging comments about what other people are going through and talk about how much worse and more real their issues are. I just figure they are self absorbed and somewhat narcissistic and that they really just aren’t worth listening to.