Im just so alone

Ya all must be sick of me. I have no one in my life to talk to. No one. I’ve since lost the one friend I did talk to because she ultimately didn’t approve of the guy I fell for being so much as alive and breathing. Yeah that pissed me off, of course. But I’m alone. And stuck with being homeless. I’d have to quit my job just to have the time to look for a place, but then I couldn’t pay for it. It’s just never going to happen. I can’t make any sense of this life, working so hard just to be homeless and alone, not mattering for shit to anyone. Of course now the problem is the extreme heat is getting in the way of my suicide method. I’m not willing to suffer severe burns minutes before my end. So I’m stuck until it cools off, but I have to hit that tiny window before it ices over and goes -50F.