Left here alone

Let me tell you! I’m a parent who has attempted suicide once. I almost succeeded & I will never ever ever try it again! I love my kids more that anything! They had nothing to do with my choice but they should have been (in my thoughts) what stopped me. I was too sick inside myself to realize! I thought my kids would have a better life without having to see my angish. I thought I was not strong enough, not good enough to for them. I was lost & hurting so bad inside all I could think was how to make it stop. I’m glad I failed at suicide. I see now how bad it would have hurt them. I know now that me at my worst is better than no me at all. They’ve told me they would have blamed themselves but there was nothing they could have done, nothing they did wrong, I love them so much but I was sick! My kids are more than good enough for me. I’m so sorry your dad was lost & sick. He was not weak or stupid. He was in pain. That’s why people kill themselves. They are not thinking clearly & no one can change that. I’ve been suicidal since my attempt