done

I’ve felt as though my entire existence has been pointless ever since I was about 13. 13 being the time I began being severely depressed as well. My mom has never really cared about me and I don’t even know what my dad looks like. As a kid I would get picked on a lot and had nobody to talk to because if I brought it up to my mom she would either agree with the person bullying me or just say something much worse. With that I began just keeping everything in. The only people who have ever cared about me are my grandmother and my grandfather. It’s sad to say but I know their time is almost up, which will mean I will have absolutely no one. I’ve never been in a relationship so I guess you can say I’m ugly as well. Unlovable even. I’m 19 now and just recently dropped out of college which my mom made sure to remind me that I’m the hugest failure she has ever came in contact with. I remember being 16 and being sent home for wearing ripped jeans and somehow that lead to her saying these exact words “you don’t even have a purpose in life”. Honestly I’m just tired of living. And honestly I don’t have a purpose, I’m just here. If anything I’m doing the world a favor by taking myself out.