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FUCK MAN i guess ill give it some time

by ismedyl

i was supposed to be dead by now but the ATF system was down so i couldn’t buy a gun then i went the next day and it was up again and i bought the gun but they didn’t have .22 bullets so i went to another store and it turns out that there is a shortage of .22 bullets in the us right now i call 10 different stores and finally find a dicks that has some in stock and i go and get them. a couple hours later i prepare for my beautiful death and take out the bullets and line them up ever so neatly and i pick 2 out of the lineup because with my luck ill get a dud and I’ll be out because i plan on shooting a bunch of beer bottles that ill drink to calm my nerves. and I’m all ready to drive to the creek where i used to go when i had friends. i inspect my firearm like a true marksman would, and there it is a friggin trigger guard… bass pro shop didnt take it off before i left the store so i guess with all of the bullshit i encountered getting this plan together ill wait 1 week and if it things don’t get better or things get worse ill be ready… ill be at bass pro shop tomorrow to get that trigger guard off and i will have that glorious painless death I’ve wanted for the past year.

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4 comments

odyssey 9/23/2015 - 2:38 am

How do you know that death is going to be such an easy exit? What is what awaits you is a lake of fire! Or you could be cast into a sort of nether-world, the land of the half-dead, which is kind of like a purgatory for those who ended their own lives which was a gift to them, prematurely?

donsmith78 9/23/2015 - 2:55 am

I hate to be that guy especially not being religious or into predetermination but maybe its not meant for you to kill yourself. A lot of events had to happen to block you. Im not trying to be preachy i just don’t want you to die. What ever you do promise yourself you will at least think through what ever you do.

hope432 9/23/2015 - 6:56 am

May you find your peace. I wish you a peaceful death and a peaceful afterlife.

ismedyl 9/23/2015 - 10:21 pm

ill say my prayers and ask for forgiveness god will forgive me i will be at peace finally and i gotta say that its really fucked up for you to put that in my head its not going to stop me but all it will do is make it less peaceful so thank you for that. i have thought about this for years i have been unhappy for years I’ve been suicidal for 2 years I’ve given myself a lot of chances to fix my issues and I’ve never been able to. I’m not good at keeping a job… I’m disappointed with my lack of friends and i have had my heart broken too often.

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