I am a 25 year old with a physical disability. My life is miserable. I suffer with pain in my leg and everyday is such a massive struggle. I have decided it is my time to go.
My boyfriend of 6 years has recently broke up with me, im so stressed
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Hi there, this forum is for sharing and venting etc., but not about discussing ways to suicide. It is against the rules here. If you want to talk though we are a great little community that is willing to listen.
hope this is better
Yes, thank you for editing.
Your Welcome
ok, i am sorry, i didnt realise
this may be inappropriate advice, buuuuut here it is.
death is an eventuality, not a possibility. just because you don’t take your own life doesn’t mean you’re gonna live forever.
so just take comfort in your own (swiftly approaching) demise. open your arms to the universe and just wait. death, i think, is like love; it’ll happen *when* it’s meant to happen, not *if* it’s supposed to happen.
and on the plus side you only have to die once but you can fall in love as many times as you want. that makes me believe in life.
That is a great way to look at it joshie.
everything is just getting on top of me. Life is such a struggle, its hard to see the good
I have a bad leg too. It really sucks. I hate how limiting it is. I’m sorry about your breakup; are you doing anything to take your mind off it?
dont really know what to do really
Usually when I go through a really bad breakup, I try to fall back on other connections, or drown myself in work and music. I also write a bunch. What does not work (and what I am currently doing) is to watch a bunch of Netflix and just go full on zombie mode….
I know that seems like the most aggravating, generic advice, especially since I’m not even following it (although god knows I’m trying). But maybe, just start with writing about it? Objectively, as if it were a story. How did it happen, how did you feel. How did he feel? What was the scenery. Concretizing things via details is a good way to move past an experience, at least I found that to be true. That’s one piece of advice I really did follow :).
i am watching Once Upon a Time on Netflix, thats really good, cheesy, but gripping
Once is actually really good! I definitely agree, it’s really corny. I haven’t actually seen season 2, but I did like season 1 alot. How far are you? I don’t wanna ruin parts of the story, but did you get to the part with Jiminy Cricket?
I’m on season 5 haa, i love the show
No WAY! There are 5 seasons??? Before they came out with new episodes, they only had 1. :/. I already wasted half my life watching the Arrow be incredibly predictable for 5 seasons. Is there even one thing that Netflix has that’s not corny? That one’s a challenge.
not many things to be honest, its all corny lol
I guess, lol. Well, I know you’re actively looking for a method, and I’m really sorry about that. You seem like a really cool person. I really do advise trying all the other stuff I mentioned before committing to the suicide route. Struggles end, you know. New struggles pop up almost immediately, but particularly nasty struggles do get replaced by less nasty ones.
yes i am looking for a way, i have fought for too many years, my life is such a struggle, and, because of my disability, even suicide is a mission
I’d like ask a pointed question, Princess. Why did your BF break up with you? You are reasonably young. A six year relationship is a big chunk of your life.
I had other questions but I found your bio.
Does your Arthrogryposis present with any other syndromes? And how did you manage to be living by yourself?
I see you’ve been dealing with you physical problems all your life. Was there a time you weren’t depressed? Do you have a hobby or something you feel passionate about, or used to feel passionate about?
You have my sympathy, but not pity! Looking at the first few comments I presume you were talking a methods right off the bat, so I take it you are not only depressed but ready to go.
In case you aren’t sure: it’s OK to talk about wanting to commit suicide and your feelings about doing it, just no details like what specific pills you would take, where you would but a gun, etc.
If you are in spiritual pain, SP is a good place to hang out. The people here are amazing.
This community is very supportive. Thank you for posting and sharing your heart.
we have been on and off a lot, he moved out at the beginning of this year. We argue a lot and im very insecure. he got fed up and ended it.
been depressed for years really. Everything is quite a blurr at the moment.
I am 100% certain i am ready
Why not give yourself a week and share with us. You can always kill yourself next week. It isn’t going anywhere after all.
a week is too long
I’m not very good at this. I don’t have a decent reply for you. I seem to have run out of pez candy. Why is a week too long?
i need to do this soon and figure out a way
because i am fed up of the battles everyday, no-body that im friends with truly understands
I won’t lie and say I understand your physical pain. Your disability is a significantly painful one. what I will say is that it is well worth giving yourself a few days with the community before making a final decision.
The choice you are preparing to make is not a light one, why not get as much input as possible, especially from people who understand, on some level, the emotional pain you are feeling. Worse case scenario you kill yourself next week right?
i don’t want people to change my mind, people can carry on without me. I don’t know who to turn to for help. I always went to my bf. he has suddenly stopped talking
I’m listening. I care.
everything is so hard, everyday is such a struggle. Even the basic needs like showering, getinng up and dressed. Its all effort. And, now without my bf, everything is so much harder. He gave me a life, a physical life that no-one else can give. I feel useless and disabled and i just cant carry on
I feel like I’m way out of my depth here talking to you. I’d like to say something inspiring that will change your mind but you already stated you don’t want to change your mind. I want to show you there is a world out there you haven’t experienced yet where you don’t need a boyfriend but I am unsure how to go about it.
I know for me talking about it makes most of my impulses tangible and a little more manageable.
i appreciate so much your willingness to talk nto me. I really cant go on. Its worse when even suicide hass become another battle. I have done lots of research and this seems to be the best way. I need to work out the logistics. I can not put my hands by my head, so i cant use a bag. life is just ttooo hard now
I respect that. I’d like to continue keeping you company on and off though. It is a lonely road you are going down, more so than the one you are currently experiencing. It seems cliche to say that we all die alone, but there is truth to it.
I am happy for you to email me
I won’t be able to give you any kind of method advice. I just don’t carry that kind of information around with me and I will continue to try to convince you not to do this.
My Dad has rheumatoid arthritis and COPD and I’ve been his hands and feet for him about six months now. He’s taken a turn for the worse three weeks ago and is now in home hospice care. Tomorrow will be the first attempt at getting him in the shower.
You bio says you have home support workers. How many and how long do they stay with you?
How long had your boyfriend known that you are determined to kill yourself? How did he feel about this?
I am not going to try to talk you out of anything, BTW.
hi hazyday, your support is appreciated
Hi, princessxx. I can understand your pain on a few levels. There is physical pain from the Arthrogryposis in addition to the pain brought on by recent events. It can be difficult when you’ve separated from someone that you spend 1/4 of your life with. Although difficult, it can be done. Sometimes it involves slowing things down and living for the moment. Each moment that you’re here is a moment that you can build on.
You met your boyfriend six years ago. The relationship lasted for a relatively long time. If you can meet someone once, you can certainly meet someone again. Maybe now isn’t the time. That’s understandable. It might be too soon. Perhaps you can use this opportunity to pursue some things that you’re interested in.
Your profile mentions that you have support workers assisting you. Do you also have a Case Manager or someone in a similar capacity? Is there someone working with you who can help establish long-term goals. You’re clearly articulate and you’ve clearly persevered through some tough situations. Those are good qualities to have in life.
Don’t underestimate yourself. Everyone has talents. You’re no exception. Maybe this is an opportunity for you to change gears a bit. Sometimes meeting people happens when you least expect it. I speak from experience.
Welcome to the site. Many of us found this place in particularly challenging moments. It’s quite a supportive community.
hi seesmith, I live in supported living so there are carers onsite all the time. I get 37.5 hrs pw of care. but i can call assistance whenever i need it.
My bf/ex has known for a while, obviously he is upset and says if i go, so will he. He has been very supportive but still wants to remain friends which hurts
hi Distant road, i am enjoying talking on here, you are all very nice
I assume you know that being a caregiver can be very stressful. How was your xBF handling it?
You said he was an important part of your caregiving regimen. I assume he wants to be with you still. Was he wanting to marry you or live happily-ever-after with you? One day you had to tell him there never was going to be any happily-ever-after?
If he says he will kill hinself, too, then it sounds like he is still very attached to you. In fact, attached is too mild a word. Deeply in love with you.
Sorry for the strange questions. I’m trying to get an idea of what your life is like. I am assuming that typing (or dictating?) is not a trivial task for you.
Hello princessxx. I’m TaDB 🙂 I’m glad you found us, and I hope you will share more of your strength and beauty with us. I’m here to listen.
I think she is sleeping. I was following her posts throughout the day.
Yeah I just wanted to leave a little note, in case she needs another pair of ears.