If I can remember correctly I got depression two years ago when I was 13. I only had it for a little bit and at the time I had no idea why I was so sad and what depression really meant. I started ignoring the feeling and I believe I wasn’t sad, but I still struggled to get by.
About five months ago I got really depressed, and it was quite severe still I managed to do things. About three months ago it slowly got worse and I couldn’t concentrate for very long, I started trying to get away from people, I have plans to leave everything and everyone I know when I’m older and had a lot of violent thoughts. Over that I thought about suicide.
After Christmas my depression has gotten a lot worse people have started to ask me what wrong, why I’m grumpy or if I don’t like them which just makes things worse. My memory and motivation have gotten a lot worse to and I guess all the other depression symptoms have kick in to; like self-harm and punishing myself.
I’m now 15 and all I want to do is run away and leave but I know I will have to wait a little longer (A couple years) till I can do that successfully so I have to wait, and the longer I wait the worse the depression gets, I think I could almost just commit suicide but if I did I would just go to hell anyways.
I don’t know what to do.