Wow. Seems like I’ll be spending New Years Eve on my own after a huge fight with my mom. A moment ago I wished that I would just fall asleep in a minute and never wake up anymore, and I still sort of do. I don’t want 2016. Everyone is telling me to be happy because 2016 is starting. It is just a year like normal. And I don’t believe that it will get better. Shit is still going on. In the last few weeks more shit has been going on than in the rest of 2015 and that shit is not going to stop. I am depressed and I won’t just get over it. No, not even with a New Year “full of new chances” coming towards me. But people don’t seem to understand. My life won’t start over in 2016 and after being depressed for almost 7 years at the age of 16, I am giving up on my life ever getting better. And if this is my life than I don’t want it anymore. 2016 means that I will live for yet another year. I don’t want that. But I guess I will have to. I need to get out of this crap. I just don’t know how.
But anyway, I still hope for everyone to have an awesome year. I hope you will feel loved, get everything you deserve (which is a lot, I’m sure), I hope you will be able to stay strong, I hope you will stay alive because you all deserve it, I hope you will all have an awesome year or at least one that will be better than this year. May 2016 be a good year for all of you. God bless you.
2 comments
007, are you me? You just wrote what I feel as well. I don’t want to live this shitty life anymore. My problem is that I can’t die, at least not yet. I still have a few things to take care of and that will keep me around for a few more years.
2016 is just another year of torture for me. The beginning of yet another miserable life.
Hope we both find a way to make it through life and its hardships, only to go through it all again in 2017 and the more years to come.
Hugs
Hugs to you too. I hope the same for you too. 🙂