nostalgic tonight.
I learned how to manipulate my own emotions when I was really young, and to comfort myself I deliberately attached importance to an object or a person. Convinced myself that each time I saw that thing I would be comforted. It works for me, especially if the object is a trustworthy person who will understand if I get too clingy.
There’s relief when I’m with him, real, intense relief. But in his absence I feel restless, sad. I miss having friends to lean on. I think I’ve driven them all away.
2 comments
I do this with music and numbers. People can change their minds or do awful things, not music though. Or numbers. Numbers never deceive me or lie.
Thumbs up for music, it can turn my emotions on a sixpence! And certain types of art/pictures…
Sadly I’ve never had an affinity for numbers, I’ve tried many a time but their love isn’t for me lol