I was feeling good until a few minuts ago. My brother made a coment about how im no better then the trash im laying in. I still know they dont love me and they will never love me or forgive me. They think yhey have me fooled but i still know, i always figure it out eventually. They think i dont think about them. I guess saying to myself that it would be easier for them when im not around counts as not thinking about them. I know its true. I always have to think about them know that they will never care about me again, and knowing that i brought it on myself. They dont understand but they will, they will see that things will be easier when they dont have to deal with me anymore. Death is always hard but its gets easier right, they will be happy again in a few weeks. They will be releaved. It will be better in the long run. I just wish i could do it somewhere else. Maby it would be easier for me to get it done, but i dont have the money. I still have my hope, i hope things get better for them and everyone else so yeah. Thank you. Thats all.
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Hang in there I’m in your shoes as well. Try listening to music. Or watch something on Netflix like zombie nation or the walking dead. I’m just giving you the coping resources that I have as for friends becarful our problems like this may chase them away just as mine did.
Ok thanks. I like zombie stuff to so it might help
First of all, you matter to ME. You matter to the thousands of people you have yet to meet in your life. You are beautiful, strong, and deserve help. I was recently very suicidal. I know that you have a solution – and it is to stay alive, and work through the issues that you have with your brother and the other people you were referring to. Even if it seems hard, ask them all to meet. Tell them how you feel. Tell your brother that you don’t appreciate it when he says things like that. Did you know that the majority of people who bully (and yes that comment is a form of bullying) are unhappy with themselves, have been bullied themselves, or are jealous of you. No matter how much you believe that your brother truly thinks that about you, he does not believe that you are actually trash. And if he does, then excuse my language, but fuck him. Find the things in life that you are amazing at, or love to do, or enjoy. Take life by the horns and make a change. Suicide is not the answer – you want to know why? Because it’s not that you actually want to die, it’s that you are suffering from too much pain and want the pain to stop. No matter how hard it is for you, depression brings you down. It alters your thoughts to make you think so negatively and be so convinced that there is no other option for you, but to die. I was suicidal myself – like I said, and I understand these feelings and thoughts very well. It was hard for me to get a grip. That being said, I couldn’t do it alone. I needed to seek professional help. If you’re in school, seek out your school’s psychologist. There are people available to help. Or if that’s not an option, search around your community for places that offer therapy (some places actually will do it for free.)
I know that it feels like nothing can change. Seeking professional help will literally change the chemicals in your brain to think more positively, and to realize that there are options that you may have never realized were there. Give yourself time – think on it – and you will see that there ARE options.
If you need to call a suicide hotline, there are many available. Here’s one I just found online:
1 (800) 273-8255
I CARE about YOU. You are valuable, special, and SO worth it to me. I want you to know that you are loved. No matter what you feel. If you would like to contact me personally, don’t hesitate to. My number is 310.880.8252.
Stay strong. <3
I dont know who you are but thanks a lot. I cant lie thoe everything your saying is alot easier said then done. Im still in my head all the time, but i still hope that things will be different. Its just hard to hold on to some times, thats why i come to this site. You said there where places that do counceling for free i tried looking where around here and couldnt find any. Ill keep trying thoe. Thanks again.
My pleasure. I completely understand things are easier said than done. With medication and therapy things are MUCH easier. Asking for help is a sign of strength. Email me or call me. I would love to help you find places that do counseling for free, and I will do my absolute best to help you find a place that does. There’s also another popular hotline that I know of called Teen Line – you can call them about any topic you want to talk about, school stress, friend troubles, advice, suicidal thoughts, etc.. They are there to listen and they give excellent advice – calls are toll free and you can call as many times as you want / need to. Your identity is completely confidential when you call. I just looked up their website and this is what I found:
Call TEEN LINE — We’re here to help! We’re open from 6pm to 10pm Pacific Time, every night. (310) 855-HOPE (4673) – See more at: https://teenlineonline.org/contact/#sthash.d0Xo1cNT.dpuf
There are so many options for you, beautiful person. I care about you a lot and am here to help. So many people are. And again, do not hesitate to call or email me – if you don’t want your identity revealed, call me using *67 (that makes the number you call from say ‘no caller ID’ when you call someone.)
Again my number is 310.880.8252
Email: frozenmangos1@gmail.com
Stay strong. We’re all here for you
<3