Had an appointment with the specialist today.
Her expert opinion was “There’s nothing more we can do for you.”
So no additional appointments were made, and as far as they’re concerned, I’m “done”.
Not even willing to discuss options about the tumor thing.
It was the oddest feeling, wheeling back out to the car, knowing I wouldn’t be coming back, but also knowing that I was still in just as much trouble.
I wonder if they just don’t want to be held liable if I end up dying while still officially a patient of theirs.
Anyway, I have another appointment with a different doctor on Thursday.ย Maybe that one will be more willing to do something to help.ย They’ve tried at least TWICE to get the x-ray records transferred over, but there seems to be a problem in getting the request granted.ย We may have to start from scratch.
If the tumor IS malignant, then we’d need to get it the hell out of there, if possible.
If it ISN’T malignant, then it can still cause trouble anyway, depending on what it pushes against.
If it’s benign and non-threatening, I can always give it a cute name and blame all my bad life choices and forgetful moments on it.ย (“What?ย No clean underwear ready for today?ย Buzzykins, how COULD you?”)
I guess option #3 (or is it #4… I lost count)… would be to just do nothing, and let nature take its course, either way.
Fortunes have been squandered gambling on lesser things, right?
I just don’t have the energy to fight it today.
130 comments
Hay cordless did u say tumour ? If so why ain’t they helping u that’s really bad ain’t they meant to give u treat ment
Yes, and yes.
I don’t know what to say except I would hug you if you were sitting next to me. And I’m not a hugger.
Me either; but I’d still take it anyway.
Oh and if you lived near me I would wheel you around my city, maybe even get one of those motorized scooter things and ride on the back. We can go fly a sign on the corner near my house until we beg enough money to go across the street and get tasty tex mex food and margarittas.
I have to use those motorized scooter things when I go shopping… I have to admit they can be kind of fun when I try to look on the bright side of things.
I haven’t run over any slow toddlers yet, but the thought sometimes crosses my mind.
Yay for TexMex… but only if it’s the super hot spicy kind. I hate mild things.
We could put my chickens in the basket, dress them up as little people. Put signs on them saying “please give them cash, or they will eat us, the brown one with the waddles won’t lay any eggs”.
Maybe the brown one just knows how to hide the eggs better than the others.
Chickens in costumes:
http://ba-gawks.blogspot.com/2011/10/chickens-in-tiny-costumes-halloween-fun.html
http://ba-gawks.blogspot.com/2011/10/chickens-in-tiny-costumes-wedding.html
Hilarious!
No this is a real thing. This lady is the chicken version of weird cat lady:
pamperyourpoultry.com/attire
And here are a selection of tutu’s for your mushu
babble.com/pets/fashion-fowl-awesome-fashion-finds-for-your-pet-chickens-ducks-and-geese-2/
OMG!
I never knew there were chicken versions of the crazy cat lady.
There are a mind boggling of version of crazy cat lady. But the chicken one is rather odd.
nooooo! i hope you can help some help! i hope you are able to live. i dont know what to say … maybe doctors could do their job better. like its kind of like you are being dismissed, but my answer is dumb, i dont know a shit about doctors
I think you got it exactly right when you said I’m being “dismissed”.
yes and thats sad because you are a kind person, but of course doctors dont give a stuff… mostly
Do u know that the tuma is cordless ? And we’re is it my I ask
The x-ray seemed to show it somewhere between my jaw and brain.
It seemed a little larger than a grape.
No one has done any further testing on it since it first appeared, which kinda bugs me. I think everyone assumes someone else is doing something.
Well some tuma can be ok but done a cancer so u need that checked they shouldn’t off discharged unlike that
Is it in the brain itself or is it in the spot between the jaw and the brain?
I honestly don’t know until they investigate further.
Since there’s problems with transferring the records, can you physically go to that place where you got the xray and go get the xray yourself, then bring it to your PCP?
It seems that he may have thrown out the records (like he did with the ones from 30 years earlier), since I’m not officially one of his patients and he didn’t expect me to return.
That would explain why they can’t retrieve the records; they might not exist any more.
Could you call or go in there yourself and ask? It seems a mighty important xray so if they’re within driving distance, it may be good to physically go there and sort it out. Without having months-long record search battle.
I didnt know about the tumor either. I am sorry. Really complex.
I wish it is benign in a weird way so that it may not only serve you as an excuse.
But you did know about it, and the news is they can’t help, or did you just find it out?
Sorry I ask so many questions.
What are you feeling?
The xray was taken two years ago.
Absolutely no follow-up of any kind has been done since then.
They haven’t even been able to get a copy of the xray from the doctor who took it.
I don’t know if it’s grown any since then, but I have noticed that I have moments now when I see things “double”. Like I’ll be looking at a doorknob and I’ll know there’s got to be only one there, but I see one PLUS a ghost image of one right above it.
Same with words. Lines of text are doubled sometimes.
I have weird moments where I can sit and stare at the wall and before I realize it, an hour has passed and I have no idea where the time went. I call it my “time warps”.
I don’t know if it’s depression related, or if it’s attributable to other things like this instead.
I do have a lot of bad headaches, but to be honest I’ve always had a lot of those, so I don’t know if it’s fair to attribute that to current issues.
Why would Doctor Who take your X-ray’s ?
.
Tom Baker was my favorite Doctor Who… I hope he’s the one who took them.
You are going to have to demand another x-Ray. If they hadn’t even got it how can they say there is nothing they can do?
Is it too expensive?
Thing is that it may still be benign and growing, but it may mean it’s localization is in a complicated place of your head that may cause those symptom or yep, maybe it’s the meds and the depression. But then again finding the right doc may help.
I know I am an ignorant.
But I ask how you feel as no all the people react the same way to the same situation , some get desperate, some sad, some feel rage, others just numbness, or I don’t know… And I feel you are somehow calm…
Sorry if I am bothering…
Where in the head does the pain shows?, it seems that the cause may be determined by its location
ToTrees: because it may contain the secret of time traveling, but maybe just to past times… Who knows
I guess I do a good job of looking calm, but on the inside I can dance between panic, desperation, bitterness, numbness, frustration. (I am a lousy dancer.) ๐
I don’t usually talk about it to people over here in “real life”.
You guys are the ones who know the most about it all.
You might think I keep spilling my guts about it and won’t shut up, but that’s just because you guys are the ones I’m currently able to talk to.
Please bear with me while I sort through all of it.
@ToTrees and @moneypenny: So, wait, does that mean my head is bigger on the inside than on the outside?
That can be my supervillain identity: TARDIS-head.
Though it sounds like a playground insult… ๐
I can teach you some nice dancing movements myself ๐
And we are always glad to read your posts and to know about you.
So:
For panic some chiles negros dulces, for desperation a nice cordless symphony (it can’t all be food), for bitterness a mint chocolate, for numbness a good movie (like seven or like mission imposible 3 with lots of action and no rest), and for frustration a good discussion about Sisifo.
But most of all I wish you an interesting night of discussions and laughs.
I don’t watch Dr. Who, but do you like Sherlock?
I hope the doctors can find away to help. I try to be positive for my time traveling. In my past (thoughts).
It’s hard not to be mean and rude to others for their sake. I go back on the 21st for another MRI, it sucks. I’m still bleeding out my nose every mow and then. The headaches are brutal, and they have me come in for pain injections so I wont drink all the morphine at once.
Hahaha hope mindlessgamer gets notes of this. I actually thought of a Barman’s villain until the playground comment, now all I see is kids calling names hahaha.
I suck at names but it may be something like timecord. But tardis is tardis… no match for it.
@ToTrees: I sympathize. ๐ I will think of you on the 21st.
So far the strongest stuff I have is the Tramadol, but it’s been making me feel sick lately. Either I’ll have a migraine the next day or I’ll just want to puke. And of course, it’s less effective each time, as is the case with all painkillers.
On my weak-willed days, I imagine just swallowing all of them (I’ve saved over 100) and saying To Hell With It.
But… not today.
I will send you a few happy thoughts I have laying around here.
You’ll know them when you see them; they look just like ants.
Be sure not to step on them; I need them back.
ToTrees sorry my comment came after yours. I was laughing about something non related hehe
I send you a hug and I can just say I’ll be hoping the 21st’s MRI comes out with revealing news. Do you mind if I ask you about it that day?
I’m thinking of you
@moneypenny: I have a “thing” for Batman villains. I like Batman too… I just seem to “understand” where the villains are coming from, and I enjoy their cynicism and their delicious insanity.
@ToTrees: Neat picture. ๐
Neat picture indeed.
Nice arms by the way.
Hey cordless have you watched unbreakable? No so good a movie but really nice theory… similar to what you say
@moneypenny: I’ve never seen Unbreakable, but this evening I can read the plot of it on Wikipedia.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unbreakable_%28film%29
Thank you, but all the love I have I give it to you and all those here on SP.
Tramadol did the same for me, I told them I would I wouldn’t take it. Said morphine or I’m gonna drink.
@MP never hard feeling on when things are said
.
๐
im eating this coconut yogurt and it tastes sour, its not off. i dont think the sourness and the chocolate flavour go well together
Is it chocolate-coconut yogurt…?
Never heard of that.
I think blueberry is probably my favorite.
*** sniff sniff ***
No coconut for me except the real thing. But I welcome the chocolate in any of its presentations
*** sniff sniff ***
I can’t quite read what’s on the shirt….
yeah it is
Oh wow…I’m so sorry Cordless; I don’t know what to say.
I’ll have to second Hazy’s hug offer. But I wish I had something good and useful to say.
Meh, sometimes hugs are better than words.
Sometimes tacos are even better than hugs…
Even better than tacos is el guacamole picante… cause its soft and spicy at the same time ๐
I have to admit I’ve never been a fan of guacamole or sour cream, but I LOVE hot peppers. All of them. The hotter the better. LOVE the heat.
I eat habaneros raw, and I cry tears of joy.
Then, later, there are stomach cramps of joy… at least that’s what I pretend they are.
Still… worth it.
Last year I had two different people give me Ghost Peppers from their gardens.
Those are even hotter than Habaneros.
Whooooo.
I loved them, and I will eventually want more, just as soon as my various body parts forgive me.
Cordless, you are crazy! guacamole and sour cream! are great! everything blends well!
you on the other eat that hot shit! makes you sweat and burp!! at the same time your wiping your head saying oh! that’s good! burp! oh that was great burp! you got a Roll-aid? burp! that’s suffering in my book! BURP!!! ๐
Ok one of this days I’ll let you try the guacamole with macadamia oil and I’ll try one of the habaneros. I wouldn’t try the ghosts ones because I have my own limits. But even so it could be a nice bbq meeting
@rocketman: You forgot about the farts.
@moneypenny: With macadamia oil? …. Really? I’ve only had macadamia nuts in sweet things, like cookies.
Cordless, OH YEAH! THE FARTS!!! OH! SHIT! IT’S BURNING MY EYE’S!!! AWWWWWW!!!
It gives new meaning to the term “Pepper Spray”.
…And, again, still worth it. ๐
Lol ‘pepper spray’
Sorry I meant chili macadamia oil. Basically chili oil
Oh!
All right. I know I like chili oil.
At least I like the Thai chili oil I once used for making a stir fry.
That was back when I was able to stand up in front of a stove long enough to cook something… and it was also back when I was living in my parents’ house. I was the only one who liked HOT things; mom and dad just wanted theirs done with boring sesame oil.
I remember mine made a glorious hot smoke vapor go though the entire house. It was like tear gas. Dad couldn’t stand it. He was coughing and crying and asking me what the heck was happening.
It was a yummy stir fry.
I like your photo too
Liking that better than the produce pic there totrees.
I’m a chef too HDS, figgy pudding my specialty,
^^ I laughed.
Out loud. ๐
Excuses are suspicious when are not demanded
Hehehe
@totrees: seriously you are a chef or you are just yanking my chain?
Yes I am an exquisite chef, Mission College of Santa Clara. California culinary academy San Francisco. But I learned more in my grandmas restaurant.
What is your favorite thing to make?
Desserts…. I like sugar.
What cuisine do you specialize in?
Ohhh ToTrees I love sweets, I want to try your desserts now… ๐
Yay for sugar!
Chocolate is always great, but I also love intense citrus things.
Lemon zest, Lime zest, Grapefruit, tangerine…
Artificial flavorings just don’t capture the oils and essence that’s in citrus zest.
One of my favorite flavor combinations is dark chocolate plus orange.
I am also a big fan of blueberry things.
I promise one of these days I will try figs. ๐
I tend to lean to southern American, Creole (meat). I’ve been spending alot of time experimenting with brazing sauces and marinades, but I’m real good with flower. Baking
@Hazy can you eat Honey? As a sugar substitute.
Please do teach us some marinades sometime, it changes it all …. do you have for chicken? I’m into chicken this days.
^_^
You said Creole meat and I thought of Cuban sandwiches don’t ask me why. I’m ropa vieja.
So do you watch cooking shows on TV and think “Meh, I could’ve done that. And mine would’ve been better!”
I do that. Constantly. At least i cook better than my grandma and mom combined? shhht don’t tell them i said that.
The first time I tried marinating chicken, I didn’t leave it on for long enough, and could barely taste it.
The second time I tried marinating chicken, I left it in overnight, and the chicken had started to dissolve. ๐ฎ
The third time I had a bowl of cereal instead.
I just realized we’ve come full circle; earlier in the thread we were talking about dressing chickens in pretty costumes. Now we’re talking about marinating them and eating them.
(*starts singing Lion King’s “Circle Of Life”*)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F4efZIHtiQQ
Lol
‘Dressing chicken’ works on both cases.
…iiiiiin the circleeeelll, the cricle of liiiiiifffe (puff)
<3
So why can’t you just make another doctor take another xray? Do they think you are just making this shit up?
Short version: The world is a crazy place full of idiots.
Long version: When I was 17, I had my head x-rayed to see if maybe my migraines were caused by neckbone issues. The results showed I had cervical kyphosis, which means my neck curves the wrong way, and pinches things. This guy wasn’t a doctor I went to a lot; he was just someone Mom sent me to for the testing.
Fast-forward to 2014: I needed that x-ray for evidence (along with a ton of other crap) when I applied for disability. So I went back to that same guy, who I hadn’t seen in almost 30 years, and asked if there was any chance he still had those records.
No.
He didn’t even remember me, and the records had been thrown away a long time ago.
SO I paid to have the x-ray retaken, hoping it would still show the same abnormal curvature.
It did.
And in addition to the curvature, he pointed to this other mass in the picture. He tried to maintain his composure, but I could tell he was a little unsettled. He said something like “Um, are you aware you have THIS?” And he strongly suggested I have my regular physician take a look at that.
I said ok, took his handwritten letter for the disability judge, and left. Haven’t seen him since.
I keep telling my primary physician about this x-ray with the mass on it that we should probably investigate. She keeps trying to send paperwork to get the records from the other guy, but as far as I know, they still don’t have it transferred. Which might mean he threw my current records away just like he threw the old ones away. (He might have reasoned that there’s no point in keeping them, since I’m not one of his regular patients).
So if I go there this Thursday, and they STILL don’t have those records transferred, I will ask point-blank if we can PLEASE get a new x-ray taken.
Excellent. I feel much better. Because after all this is all about me feeling better right, and not the jelly bean growing in your head.
My second MRI the Tech, told me he could not comment on the image that the doctor is liable for the diagnosis he said ( liable ). Which I read under their Oath, a diagnosis requires treatment. They don’t want to be financially responsible if you can’t pay. Cuz they have to treat you if the diagnos you
I fucking hate American medicine.
Seconded.
What bugged me about the specialist I saw today was that they’re not going to see me anymore about ANY of my issues now.
They don’t want to have to deal with the blot on the x-ray, so they’re distancing themselves from that, but ALSO now I won’t be able to see them for my Equinovarus issues, or my back pain issues, or the cervical kyphosis, or the enchondroma, or anything else.
All of a sudden it was “We’ve done all we can; there’s nothing more we can do for you.”
So I’m back to just having my primary physician now.
Who is nice and sweet, and I like her a lot, (and I want to keep her) but I wish she was more assertive about things like this.
I mean I get the words and all but I really don’t get it. How can they just do so?
Health here in my contry is complicate, expensive and irresponsible.
But I can see there too, there are too many things in the middle that makes it inhumane.
:/
But then again maybe this change of doc could end up leading you to the hands of someone better. Let’s also hope for that
I really do like my primary physician. She and I get along fine, and she usually listens to the things I explain.
It’s just this particular topic, for some reason… nobody wants to be “the one” responsible for taking charge of it.
I think if my primary can just get her hands on those records, she’ll start investigating and referring me to people, but in the meantime, nothing is happening.
Nothing except my other doctor (the “specialist”) dropping me today like a hot potato.
My mom says: ‘lo que no sirve que no estorbe’
Cordless, GOD DAMMIT! I didn’t no about the tumor! shit! i’m sorry ๐ i know nothing? i’m not a doctor of course don’t know where it is nothing! i am pissed! i give you this it won’t be malignant! I have special powers!!! your going to have to handle the rest.
If you have special powers, send me a time machine and a pint of dark chocolate ice cream.
I think rocketman just squatted and laid an egg.
Don’t fuck it up! it wonโt be malignant! I’ve done it before.
Hello Cordless ๐
Nice to meet you.
Girl, do you want to live?? So please try another doctor till you find s.o. to help you properly. It was ridiculous what that one did. Totally unethical !!!
I recommend you to go to an homeopath because they will check you entirely and recommend you an specialist who can check you as a whole body&mind, not only a tumor.
Give up everything for some days and rest. Find a good doctor and the cure is exhausting!! Take yoyr time.
But next week restart if you wanna live.
Be brave! I send some strengh to you ๐
=^.^=
I feel like i’m pretty late to the party (yeah, i know, not funny), but yeah, do look up for another opinion. I’ve had several doctors give up on me or tell me (just live with it) regarding many of my conditions. Funnily enough, i’m pretty sure i’ll fix at least some of them, even if only partially, regardless of what the doctors say. In the end, it’s your own body and you know best what’s right and not, don’t you?
(And after reading that i’m getting a 4th opinion on an enlarged node on my neck. Pretty sure it’s pressing a nerve, so thanks for the inspiration).
Yay on getting a 4th opinion!
Funny how some opinions are more expensive than others…. ๐ฎ
Funny how the more expensive are usually not the best! lol. Google is free and it has given me best advice than most of the docs i’ve visited. The day they create a google app that does mri and ct scans over the internet, docs are doomed!
I’m still waiting for the Star Trek tricorders to be invented.
We can just wave it over ourselves and say “Oh, ok. I’ve got arthritis in my left thumb, cirrhosis of the liver, parasites from the sushi I had, a loose eyelash, and next Thursday I’m going to be constipated.”
Yaaaay.
I think.
cordless… you know you are the wittiest mofo north of the mason dixon line
I dunno; the competition is pretty fierce!
no..you got the nothern territories covered… and i be reprizenting for da dirty dirty south…
South? Really?
Somehow I imagined you being in one of the New England states.
i and just here for a bit.. i am a writer and i travel for inspermation.. i mean inspiration..
Or both, perhaps.
well yes.. but i didnt want you to think of me aลก a bloke of ill repute..
LOL!
That ship already sailed with the Cheetos.
(Which I ate yesterday, by the way)
ah snap..ya got me there cocheese
If you ever have a TV show, can we call it, “Cordless: Unplugged”?
It’d be so awesome! and you could totally make your own theme song!
You are so cool, btw.
Trey, the mindless gamer.
Your number 1 fanboy ๐
“Cordless: Unplugged.”
๐ฎ
I can just see the awkward humor: Since it’s a suicide site, at the end of every episode they would unplug me from life support.
And then I would be back again mysteriously somehow at the beginning of the next episode, sort of like Kenny on South Park.
Cue:
“Oh my god! They killed Cordless!”
“You bastards!”
You should totally have a TV show.
I’d watch it every night.
๐ ๐
Life can really be unfair. I’m sorry about all the pain Cordless.
I’m not familiar with the American health care system so it’s difficult to comment however diagnosis and treatment should be standard. I don’t understand why a follow up image has not been taken, this is an issue which I would press, at least then you know what you are dealing with. Maybe you could force the issue with something unrelated such as saying you had a fall, hit your head, are in severe pain and suspect a possible fracture. Sometimes you have to manipulate a situation to receive a desired outcome, this is not something I would usually say however we are talking about your health.
Also about “time warps” I have heard people describe this as a side effect of medication, this may or may not be the case.
Anyway, I just hugged you in my thoughts.. Hope you felt the squeeze!
Thank you for the hug!
Wow I’m so sorry. And is that really ethical of them? Geez those jerks I can’t believe they just refused to try. I’m not a hugger either but would hug ya if you wanted. I hope this other place does right by you.
I’ve discovered that the world is full of people and things that aren’t exactly always 100% ethical.
If you’re not really a hugger, you could improvise by sending a kitten or a bag of gummy bears or an awesome-smelling bottle of herbal shampoo.
Bad advice, last time I put a cat in someone’s mailbox it was highly frowned upon.
Lol. Actually, I remember watching a doco about a cat alerting their human about a tumour.
http://9gag.com/gag/a0YNYBq/i-leave-my-mailbox-open-for-ten-minutes
@alan: Didn’t you poke holes in the mailbox so it could breathe?
@NIA: I used to have a cat that seemed intent on staring into my left eye whenever my migraines were on that side. It was… it… wait…. I think that’s actually the side the tumor is on… OMG. Wouldn’t that be something if he knew? This would’ve been about 7 or 8 years ago; I don’t even have that cat anymore. (!!)
It’s definitely interesting, animals have amazing abilities. I wouldn’t read too much into it thought, it’s easy to be misled by conformation bias. Research and several opinions can be so important, you seem well informed so there is no issue there. I guess there comes a point where you need to lay trust and responsibility with a doctor, after all it is their profession, the key I think is just finding a good doctor.
Animals have stronger senses, So it wouldn’t actually be a magical thing. Now a days there are experimenting dogs being used to smell cancer in people
@Moneypenny. Agree, a lot of things seemed magical until they are found scientifically sound. It’s often just a mater of time. I have also heard about the dogs being used to smell cancer and find it awesome, it also has the added benefit on making the patients time more enjoyable. I would prefer to see a dog then an MRI machine.
I agree, at the same time dogs help with the diagnostics bit also with the treatment. Nice.
And I am not implying all tumors are cancers, I just remembered the dogs thing when you mention the cat staring
You can have a fluffy kitten carrying gummy bears
Fun Fact: It is currently early Tuesday morning, and I have not slept since Sunday morning.
sorry Cordless. Life sucks when you can’t sleep.
Normally I’m against pills, but, are there any pills you can take, prescription or otherwise, that can make you sleep?
…horse tranquilizers? O_o
Lol. You could shoot yourself with those tranquilizer darts that they use at the zoo. Easy to administer and fast acting.
That sounds about right.