After discovering a certain video, I used that as a calming video to prevent me from cutting. It’s not a calming video with ocean waves on the background but a seemingly offensive video that makes me laugh and let my urge to pass. It was seen as offensive by many because of its harsh tackle on cutting but sometimes I need that slap on the cheeks and a fucking reminder to stop hurting myself. And it’s very helpful. I’ve surpassed urges because of these videos and it feels so awesome. I hope I can keep this up.
As of today, I was being blamed for things I haven’t done. They called me names. And if it was the past me, I would have locked myself and start crying and cutting but now I feel more alpha towards my urge. Like screw you, I know it’s not my fault so I won’t take your shit as an excuse to inflict pain to myself.