Been lurking on and off in the dark periods of life for years, now I’m looking for some advice.
I’m m27 and probably been depressed more or less for 10 years+. I’m finally getting some help and facing a lot of fears and problems that I’ve ignored. Due to being depressed and that leading to anxiety and some degree of isolation how do you return to normal life and in particular dating when you feel like you cant tell anybody about the last 10 years because you fucked up everything by either being sad, selfdestructive or wasted?
4 comments
I am 41 and feel no different as when I was 21 except I drink much less and hardly ever use any drugs. Trust me when I say to you that 27 is only two years into REAL adulthood, don’t even think about the past 10 years as anything but water under the bridge. I say this from the perspective of someone in the same exact 10 year end but now 41. The women I am attracted to are all too young for me and all the women who are attracted to me look as old as my mother. People say ‘look at all that gray hair!’ when they see me after my 10 year disappearance into depression – on the couch, watching TV, feeling closer to the characters on my favorite TV shows and movies than any living, breathing human being. You have a great 10 years in front of you as people are not having kids until well into their 30’s (but not their 40’s) and it’s nobody’s G-damn business where you were or how you felt for the past 10 years. Move to a new city or town or state and become a new man/woman. You have your youth, which is the most valuable commodity one can have – all the money in the world, or power or fame cannot give anyone what you have! I know you feel 27 is middle aged or something but TRUST me…it is not. You are in the prime of your life and just look at it like you’ve jumped over some of those awkward years when everyone has no compass as to the direction their life is heading. Good luck, and I admire your youth. ~AHA
Well said! I am now 34. I am fucked up and always been. Actually many girlfreinds told me that and that I should look into it. What you said about women happens to me to. Oh well. I will probably never have children, never get married and die broken, homeless and alone.
Wow.. Thanks for giving me some perspective
I’m 27 as well and lived this whole time practically in a bubble, and I can say I quite understand the feeling. It’s so scary and I’m always anxious to step out. It’s like feeling when you want to step out but hide at the same time? Sadly, it takes a lot of courage, and a lot of stamina to overcome it. Baby steps, I guess. I go out one day, interact with people and by the end of the day, I’m exhausted and I want to hide away for the rest of the week, but check in with people if you can’t meet them in person. What I’m saying is if you can’t take a whole day of interaction, then interact in small doses–do something that will put you out there and start interacting with other people. If you can’t or don’t want to tell your past, be honest that you don’t want to dig up the past, or that maybe not now but in the future you can tell them. In any case, any potential partner should respect that at the very least.