I wish I had the river of Death

to skate away on

–

I’m literally just holding on because my birthday is 16 days away and there’s going to be a delicious meal waiting for me at home and my dog is there and even though my dog wouldn’t know if I died I’d still like to see his chubby furry face again.

The birthday itself isn’t significant. People are born all the time and die all the time

Weirdly though the reminder of my age makes me feel more fixed, less violently swinging in a pendulum of hopeless emotions