I’m jus fine with dying alone

hey deathispeace, how ya doin…. not good?? well, same thing here… yeah its painful when people betray ur trust… had mine deceived many years ago…. so, yeah… i dont trust people anymore either… its like being traumatized… couldnt sleep properly last night, fear built up, cos i’ve panic disorders, OCD, depression… i think ul agree with me on this- everyone’s life sucks!!! but u know, i have learnt that problems in life are not really impossible to solve – very painful and complicated? yes, impossible, no. am almost 30, about to get married soon but still haven’t able to set things straight with my old folks before i move on to a new life. but what can u do pal, life is hard. however, we can always make our problems less problematic. its simple, but not easy (on the contrary, its very difficult). the steps are short, but the energy and time they consume are huge. like u maybe, i dont have friends, my family despise me, went thru hell on earth since my early age, but then, this is my life. i can do whatever i want with it, save it or throw it away, its my choice. all those years i was killing myself unknowingly bcos i thought i was as bad as those people who stabbed me day and night for years. we all must realise one thing, that we cannot live alone. maybe you can survive alone physically, but deeply inside ur dying a painful death when no one’s there for you. like it or not, we are not designed to survive alone. i was hated, despised and excommunicated from everything and everyone, its very painful. i was bleeding terribly but no one was there for me. i didnt know what to do, so i withdrew into my shell and locked the door forever bcos i couldnt take the excruciating pain. maybe ur in ur shell right now, had locked the door just like i did back then. its ok, you are deeply hurt and confused. i understand. you’re not going to like what i’m about to tell you, but i must bcos its very crucial for you. that shell will not give you the peace you are worthy of. you, like many others, deserve better than a suffocated life in a dark, gloomy room. i want you to come out of that shell bcos that shell is not ur home, it never was. this is your life. and life is the most precious of all, and are you going to lock it in a dungeon till it dies? dont !!! i’d done that with mine and i lost everything i had left of me. i’m not saying that you should go out there and start hurting people. No. and i’m not saying that you’ll attain a perfect life out there. people will never understand but i will never let my life die again just bcos of some people’s ignorance, and neither should you. so you must go out there and live a life of a real human being bcos u r human and not some feeble turtle on some lifeless beach. it will not be easy, like i said earlier, but its worth it and its a must, bcos you have only one life. so get up bro (or sis) and go reclaim back ur lost kingdom and make it more beautiful than it was before the fall.
take care…