Nothing changed

Hi,everyone so I’m back ,technically nothing changed ,I just wanted to keep you updated,but lately i had a very deep wound in my hand ,it hurt me a lot but C’mon ,who cares?mum told me that she hated me she told me not to take the medicine ,she told me that she didn’t want me to cure and she doesn’t care if I died !so you got it now ,just imagine ,what would you do if you were me ?what would you do if your mother hated you ?

it hurts more than my hand’s wound does ,I can’t move out,my mental state is deteriorating and I’m being suicidal but i don’t know what to do!