I have saved an many people from suicide, but whenever I am at my worst no one is there for me.
I am the type of person that would save someone from a burning building even if they made me cry myself to sleep every night. Yet All people do is talk shit about me behind my back and tell me how much of an asshole I am.
No one realizes that I cry myself to sleep every night. Yet whenever I try to tell people about my problems, they talk shit about me saying how I complain about little things.
Life is a meaningless void of emotions that can only be healed by things unreachable by most.
Maybe I’ll become an alcoholic like my dad, or a hoarder like my aunt.
I cant tell anyone how I feel. When I tell my parents that I’m feeling down they immediately want to send me to a psychiatrist. I’ve done that before when I wasn’t younger and it made me feel crazier than originally. My family just wants to medicate me when all I need is someone to talk to.
Thanks for listening and any tips/helpful words are welcome and appreciated.
3 comments
Hi
Know how you feel. It’s difficult when you are a helper but receive no help in return. People are mostly stuck in their own heads trying to get through their own lives. It’s no reflection on you. I guess humans are inherently selfish.
Maybe try writing down your thoughts/feelings – just let it all out warts and all. That has helped me in the past. No-one judging you when you do that.
You have the right to decide if you are medicated or not.
I hope someone close to you comes through for you. Everyone needs to be recognised.
I know the feeling, I used to get bullied all the time yet these people would always act like they were your best friend when ever they wanted help with their problems. Its funny, people always want you to help them with their shit yet they dont give a fuck when you need help.
I know all too well how it is to listen but not be heard. Life’s emotions cannot be healed by unreachable things. Even the rich and successful can hate themselves. The only way to be happy is to accept that all you have is the present and you are the happiest you ever were or will be. So be happy. You can talk to me anytime.