If it were my Suicide note :

My Suicide note:

hey.. I never liked endings, but if you read this, than you know I decided to end it all.
each part is secluded for each one of you.
To my mom : I wished I was smarter and greater.
I wish I could have forsaken you before I ever been born. Maybe if I would have been a bit more smart, I would change reality and will make things right.
I know you believed in me and wanted me to get this through. I just couldn’t. I was never alive, I never really trusted any human, and felt like an alien. I has some feelings, but mainly I felt autistic.
I wish you had better life. I tried to change yours for better but failed to get more strength. I really love you and always will, maybe one day you will meet me. I hope you get to heaven, but I’m not sure about my destiny in the after life.

To my brother. You were the best brother I could have ever had. I love you so much. You made me happy when I was sad, and with you around, I never felt alone. I thank you so much for so long. I wish I could have been a better brother. I failed at a lot of things – I should have bought you more gifts and been there more times. You always said you love me more than I did. I froze each time I wanted to tell you how much I can feel, because I was in a war zone and had to stand as an alpha male.

To my dad : you will never be my father, we are only biological related. You always stood in my way, and you always have been the other kind of a men. I became a real man and you stayed a real *****.
I’m unlike you by each mean and I hate you so much that I just wanted to say that seeing you still alive here, makes me turn in the fucking grave. I hope you will kill your self.

to my friends:
I know you wanted the best for me, well some of you. Roni, I like you so much you definitely were my best true friend. All the others are fine but I will never forget your inability to have some sympathy and to help me getting through those years.

To my ex gf/ ex female friends:
You bitches never knew true of me. I got way ahead of you in life. I gave up, but I still want let you know that I cut our relation because I hated you so much for what you had and didn’t appreciate. I never talked about my self because you lacked the scale to NOT FEAR MY PROBLEMS.

To my ex love: Katya.
You have been such a hoe, I loved you with each part of my heart, but you were such a pen**s seeking hoe that you dated the whole word while we had something both sexually and emotional between us.

To university friends: keep rocking for me.

To all my ex classmates and people who knew me, please fuck off my own ceremony. You never really cared. And if you are, than please help my mom with fixing the house. thanks.