One more day ….

Well hey people of the Suicide Project….. Its me again . Ive posted before about the loss of my GF of two years due to my family . I’ve raised a wonderful kid in that relationship he’s 5 now and reading im proud of him ….. Its been a month since the last time i saw my (Ex) and i still miss her & little man everyday . I know she wont take me back . We got along so well never argued and always laughed with eachother….. Love her more than life itself . Which speaking of life ….i dont see a point anymore . No money …. Cars gone ….my woman is gone and the one child that motivated me so much id even work two jobs to provide for what i saw as my little family or as we called ourselves ….is gone . Ill be honest i almost attempted . I bought a bag of Charcoal some mikes lemonade …eCIG which ive only used once prior in life . Figured why not enjoy last moments . But for some reason i couldnt do it ! I dont know why or if its the human bodys will to live or some freakish biological reason …. I was ready to light the Charcoal . (Sigh) …. I maybe actually do tommorow . Plan on lighting in roon and bringing my blanket my soft pillow and drink a few and attempt to die in my sleep honestly tired of tbe world . Tired of being judged based on social status lack of college ect and girls just want to many expectations….whixh im not intersted ….i loved my lady …amber … We had so many similar views both athiest we’d go out to eat and both in shape , take little man out with us to chuckee cheese as i chased him around …. It was a blast …two years . I miss them more tha. Anything . Tbis could very possibly be my second & final post ive set up a time to light the charcoal and maybe find peace ? Family most likely will find me but i dont care . Call me heartless . But i see every body else happy , kids & married . And im back home due to bad luck with my family turning against her . With a family i hate now . Wish me luck people ….i hope i succeed . And please no religious comments i mean your welcone too . But if i died the only thing id hope for is maybe see my baby sister again who died at 2 years old she’d be 22 now a year younger than me ….any other case give any god or deity the finger ….hopefully just nothingness . Tbanks people …..- Mike