When almost nothing brings you joy anymore
Making music as well as exercise gave me the strength to cope with my depression at times. But for awhile now I’ve noticed that i lost interest in what once brought joy to me.
I no longer play guitar or piano like i used to. I don’t exercise like before and mostly spend my days on the couch on my phone, watching TV and playing video games.
A new and unusual interest
When i started losing my interest in my usual hobby’s that kept me from literally killing myself, i gained an interest in…mathematics! It’s quite strange, but for some reason whenever i do maths it’s like i’m in a different world and for a moment i forget about how miserable and suicidal i feel.
I’ve been exploring very basic math idea’s for myself and I’ve slowly been expanding it ever since. I even managed to come up with a cute little trick to calculate square numbers by exploiting a numerical pattern i spotted ”x² = (1-3-5-7-9)”.
So that when i have to calculate the area of a square (let’s assume the square is 85 by 85 cm) it takes significantly less time to calculate, getting to my answer of 7225 cm²
So yeah that’s my strange way of coping with depression at times haha. What hobby’s do you all pursue to cope with depression?
4 comments
Damn, I kind-of wish math was my new hobby. If I found it interesting then maybe I wouldn’t struggle so much in maths class at school, lol. Its a pretty cool hobby to have though, ngl. Very intellectual.
I personally like drawing. When I draw, I just stop paying attention to anything else and only focus on the drawing. I find it pretty therapeutic.
Drawing is so cool! I’ve always admired the those who can just draw something, especially when it’s off the top of their heads. I can definitely imagine it being therapeutic.
Nice hobby 🙂 !
I have been a musician recording artist most of my life. Im mainly a guitarist but can play most anything like drums, bass, keys etc proficiently. I have lost my love for music and although I have been drumming lately because I do still enjoy taking out all my frustrations that way. But now its been hard to do even that because it causes my ears to ring worse than they already do. with tinnitus. Now Im seeing my ex wife again and she is bipolar as ever and she still can frustrate like usual. Right now all I want to do is stay loaded on valiums and play Sim city 3000. Another job fell thru and I don’t even care. I have no idea what to do with my pathetic life anymore. I still just want to die.
I can relate. Like honestly…all i have been doing so far is play Call Of Duty and the occasional mathematics. And yes the suicidal tendencies too. My head has been a bit more quiet these last 2 days and i’ve had some decent sleep for the first time in awhile.
I wish you the same peace of mind, even if it’s just for awhile.