Had it been 3 Days since? The Reason of my Traumata which drained the Happiness, the Hope and the Future in every agreeable Type I had left before the Person decided to repeatedly hit into my Life and disappear did contacted me again, now after a Year ago when the Cause of this Suicidal to the Grave State occured due the appearance of the Person.
The Person relieved me from the Amnesia but forgot to accompany an such crucial and critical Phase of Healing. The Person intended to Help me, and I gave all I got into it. I understand when the Person eventually did not planned to do, or did planned to do it in the mindless Way it choosed to go on to me. I accept that I did wrong trusting, I did wrong believing, hoping, accepting and loving, getting left and been drench in Pain and Sucidal Acts of an whole different Level than I used to. I lost 10.000€ just trying to get over it without making it. A lot of things happened that I can not tell this Person just swiftly as it could be. I can not Love, I can not hate. I am planning an Extinction Therapy to disregard from Suicide Assistance, to disregard an Court Filing against this Person. The Person is working in the Health Sector which makes it even more brutal what happened there.
Hit and Disappear. Each Time the Person does, I could hang myself on a Rope. Everytime this happens, I am guiding myself to suppress myself with Morphine. This can not go on like this Forever.
I get no dignity, no relief without having to expect more of harm for me. I get no healing, I get no compensation. I can not flee towards other People. I have nobody to talk about it at all. I can not desire to want to put my losses on to this Person as I can not Imagine as Life anymore honestly, and am still trying to make the Person atleast Free from the Deadly Incidents that had been caused by the Person. I could need that all, but I am unable to make Life out of it. After the Extinction Therapy, it is still unclear if I could Life on without the need of Suicide Assistance. The World feels Empty, and all I got is the Perpetrator which is forgetting Dignity, Patience and Seriousity, and I got to Accept it kindly as it does not need to know the Meassurements waiting for me to really making it or making it not. I am exhausted.