It’s interesting the difference between time and recorded time. Does anything have meaning once people stop recording it?
No one has recorded my life. I will be forgotten even quicker than I arrived. If I died right now, no one would even notice. I’ve always wondered how long it would take someone to find me after I die.
The unexamined life is not worth living. Certainly that applies to me. My life is not worth living. I suppose I do have a therapist that examines my life so to speak, she is at least aware of my existence and my thoughts. I imagine she would notice if I disappeared, perhaps thinking “I wonder what happened to that guy?”
I left my parents home when I was 16. I think it was for the best, but I’ve never been sure. They did make my life worse, but it never ended up getting any better after I left. Jokes on me I suppose. I left their home but I never had any of the skills required for humans to thrive. I was never able to make friends or form social connections. I guess never is wrong, I did have one friend, once. That was something.
I miss having hope. I can’t wait for this to be over.