I thought alcohol was a cure to my social anxiety and at first everything was fine. It felt good. It felt really good. I felt like I could finally socialize normally like a normal person and I was. However it got to a point eventually where it started turning me into something that I wasn’t. I began hurting people without even realizing it. I lost myself. It’s like I wasn’t even me anymore. Everything about me eventually changed. I just drank so much and so consistently. I would wake up every morning and go straight to the corner store and purchase alcohol. I would drink all day everyday. Everything is messed up right now. I did so many bad things. I got a DUI and almost killed someone. I said some terrible things to my mom. I became a complete jerk to some of my coworkers. I hurt everyone I care about.
I feel like a monster. I feel so ashamed. I haven’t felt like crying in so long…. I’ve had enough of this poison. It’s killing me from the inside. I’m gonna make things right. I swear if I keep doing this I will personally end myself. I’d rather die than be a danger to society.