It just happens. Attraction is chemical, I think that we can be forgiven when our inner mechanism fails to anticipate what is going to happen.
I get it, the desire to distance oneself from romantic failure is a very natural one. The pain is likely the sharpest you’ll ever feel. You do have a say so in how a relationship proceeds. Attraction is chemistry, but what you do with it has to do with your adaptive mechanisms. I have an old bit that I built in my late teens, when I discovered my chemical process was bringing me people who I didn’t even like….
Learn to talk yourself out of things you think you want. Let the desire sit, and judge the practicality of fulfilling it. Maybe it is worth chasing, but far more often it isn’t. Going from the gut is a romantic notion, not a particularly effective cognitive strategy.
4 comments
That person was sent to you as a life lesson. Just let it go n learn from it.
Kind of reminds me of that brilliant line from In This Moment’s “Whore” – You love me for everything you hate me for
I never understood what that means. Can u put it in simple terms cuz my brain is confused by that lyric
It just happens. Attraction is chemical, I think that we can be forgiven when our inner mechanism fails to anticipate what is going to happen.
I get it, the desire to distance oneself from romantic failure is a very natural one. The pain is likely the sharpest you’ll ever feel. You do have a say so in how a relationship proceeds. Attraction is chemistry, but what you do with it has to do with your adaptive mechanisms. I have an old bit that I built in my late teens, when I discovered my chemical process was bringing me people who I didn’t even like….
Learn to talk yourself out of things you think you want. Let the desire sit, and judge the practicality of fulfilling it. Maybe it is worth chasing, but far more often it isn’t. Going from the gut is a romantic notion, not a particularly effective cognitive strategy.