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Thank you…

by LoneSoul

i would love to first start off with my appreciation for this Website, no matter the good or the bad side doesn’t matter either way. All of us are here with situations/issues any type of motive you might say behind our pain, problems, suffering. We come here to heal and cope with our daily life experience we live in. I have to give my thanks to those who reached out to me. And also the stories I have read here. It was an eye opener for me in many ways. I always come here when I’m at my weakest point. I don’t like way this world is going truthfully. This is gonna be my last post here… And to those who Here. Thank you really. I might not know you but thanks for giving a response or any sort of your time. Sincerely hope you find a way to get past your own Situation. Peace.


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PPPP3 6/3/2021 - 1:45 pm

Hi- I hope you don’t mind me asking, but why did you decide this would be your last post here?
I haven’t be here for well over a year, but came back knowing/hoping people here might understand how I feel.
I think about wanting/needing to die (the best + only choice) close to 20+ hrs./day. Unfortunately I simply can’t get myself to do it.
Sadly, even though I’m certain being dead would be best 🙁
Not living + not dying is a really crummy place to be stuck, alone.
Living is so unbelievably hard with no hope or purpose anymore.
Dying would be so much easier, so what stops me? IDK.
– Sadly I have nobody else, who might understand, my feelings, so I came back here…
I suppose it was to push myself closer to dying ? IDK.
Maybe the opposite?
I need to stop thinking and take action.
I know I can not keep living under current circumstances -Tried hard to fix things.
Time has come to give up. No other choices.
Nobody wants to help me with any of the big problems (that make my life a living hell).Medical, financial etc.
I can’t fix any, alone. I tried really hard.
So that’s it. End of a long journey that always had a little hope, now all gone.
Sorry for kinda rambling,
but I really want to know why you don’t plan on coming back? Hope you answer.
And if you got this far, thanks for reading.
It means a lot to me that somebody might be interested or care about what I’m thinking.
Dying alone, with not 1 single person even caring or knowing (whether it be *natural causes or whatever) is going to really suck 🙁
I have breast cancer, high blood pressure, IDDM ×47 yrs. + bunch of other med problems,
so it’s possible.
I pray I will die in my sleep, peacefully.
Hopefully once I’m dead I won’t even remember how alone I was.
God loves me, but that’s it. (I know it should be enough but it’s not).
And I really do truly love (care) about my neighbors,
but apparently NONE of them care about me (really).
Makes no sense, but it’s the truth.
When my life was going well, years ago, seemed everybody liked + cared about me. Now=Zero.
I definitely should delete this whole post (I do that often). But I won’t. Why? Idk.
Hope you all are having a better, more productive day than I am.
0Sorry if my post too long (it is) or too boring. Bye.

LoneSoul 6/3/2021 - 4:45 pm

Appreciate it for taking your time really. Sorry for what your going thru. Im making a choice really for myself. I see the thing that I do to myself every year. Trying to sugarcoat myself thinking. It’ll be alright this time. I’ve had enough of it really

Sbilko 6/6/2021 - 7:52 am

I have been feeling suicidal at one point in the past, and things did get better, and it came that I even forgot I had even ever considered suicide to be an option, until I was reminded a month ago (which helps me feel more compassion for you)

I am really sorry for your pain. Please do not make things like this, which cannot be undone. We have only one life, and things do get better!

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