Often, I find myself in this cycle, where I juggle between numbness and suicidal thoughts. I push away people who love me because I’m an idiot, and I hate myself for never being good enough. I’ve been trying to not use drugs as a way to cope, but every day, the idea of using more dangerous methods of self-harm seems to flood my mind in the hopes of ending this anxiety-ridden nightmare I call existence. This is my first post, and I feel weary that this “rant” may offend some people. I’m not used to sharing how I feel. I hope maybe someone may read this and feel a little less alone if they can relate.