Lonelier than I was before I had friends

My friends, from grade school and beyond, kept me from making a fool out of myself…taught me things I didn’t know, were there for me when I needed a friend, etc.

Friends are almost as valuable as family, sometimes more so. Sometimes family can be your worst enemy…I guess that depends on the family members you have.

But the trouble with friends is that they come and go…sometimes they move away for other jobs, or the relationship sours or other issues can happen.

What I’ve learned is to have a large pool of ‘good’ friends say 10-20, because you’re guaranteed to lose at least half of them for the reasons I mentioned…then it’ll whittle down to a handful as you get older (at least in my case).

The worst part is as you age is that it gets harder to make new friends. For some reason adults are not as interested in bringing new people into their lives…even if that person happens to be ‘amazing’ in so many ways-they’re amused for a bit but then don’t want to make the effort to have you in their lives.

But that can also be a problem with the people you’re looking to become friends with…maybe they’re under-educated and are intimidated or envious of your education and they have their own little group they’re comfortable with.

I guess I’m ok so far in that dept… but should my friends move (to work elsewhere for example), then I really don’t have any fall backs except with my high school buds who I haven’t talked to in 20 years….and I’ve tried to find them but no luck…. even though I’ve made myself easily reachable on FB and elsewhere.

My high school friends were an even more solid connection…but we drifted and then didn’t stay in touch. One of the worst things that happens is they get married/have kids and then barely ever call…it’s their loss too, since being with your family can get dull.

Anyways if you are able to hang onto a few friends it’s worth it…5-10 is a good number. Even if I was down to a couple I wouldn’t mind. I am worried I could still lose a few friends as some barely stay in touch, another might leave the country…anything can happen. But so far so good.