accepting pain like others do. i never do, i never resign myself to it, i delude myself because i am determined to stay attached to this life and its goodies. i easily cast aside those who do not appease me. i want to be a better person but i sometimes think being a better person in my case is just neglecting myself on some level.
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It’s unclear; are you saying that you feel your relationship with pain is unhealthy, or that you are critical of how others relate to pain?
My relationship with pain has been unhealthy. I have hurt people intentionally. I’m unsure if I got anything out of it (I must not have if I’m questioning it?), but even if I did (and I know the pleasure there is a miniscule one at least in my case), I should not indulge. I am also critical of how others relate to pain, but that was me not being in a sober mindset. I often criticize others for displaying pain, thinking it’s unnecessary or distasteful, basically lacking empathy. You told me once we don’t have to be happy all the time. I sometimes have had a hard time judging other people for their negative emotions/reactions while ignoring my own. I’m unsure of how human this feature is, I know eternaldarkness hates most people on the planet, I guess I’m just wondering how empathic the average person is because I feel like I’m on the average to low spectrum, it’s flickered on a lot more recently.
pain is necessary, for health I’m starting to realize. Middle age is a trip, because you absolutely have to start eating less and get more active, neither of which is pleasant. I just had a very healthy meal, the dominant flavors of which were onion and raddish. I’m still sore from some of the working out I’ve been doing, my life is about trying to figure out how much pain I can manage.
but it makes the sweet stuff sweeter when you get it, both literally and metaphorically. My wife insisted on buying some sugar cookies last week. I wouldn’t buy such a thing lately, I’m dieting and that’s my weakness. But I had a few, ah, such nirvana.
but I’ve been watching a lot of stuff about diabetes lately, my grandad had it, one of my close friends has it, it is the lingering specter that keeps me on the straight and narrow. It can really screw up your feet, like in ways that make the Shining look like Shining Time Station (oh right, that’s probably an outdated reference). That make It look like Skittles? not as good, but at least still relevant.
but I’m convinced what matters is controling the flow, more than the amount. If you’re living life right, you’ll get pain. Don’t run from it, that doesn’t work, just find a space and time to deal with it.
I think it’s natural to try to get away from pain. Our natural indicator.