I posted last week and I was angry. I’m feeling better. I have a question and I’m just if this is only happening to me, or if this is happening to other women? Men don’t seem to like me. My dad hates me and people try to tell me that he must love me somehow. It’s strange because my mom or brother can talk about how mean he is and they believe them. I believe my dad is narcissistic. He always want attention, he acts up over everything, wants to always control things. I can never do anything right in his eyes. He’s so petty about trying to get at me like saying that my animals are smarter than me. He thinks my interests are stupid. He even curls his lip when I talk to him. My brother tells my mom that he only tolerate us as a family. He’s mean to me. When I was younger I had females bullies growing up, but one day I stood up to one of them in the freshman year of high school and then it was like my bullies switch to men. They act weird around me like for instance I had to this guy handing notes to me in class that he liked me and then when I came up to talk to him, he would then avoid me. He did it again and again, that I finally would leave me alone and that’s when the bullying from him happened. I had guys display their rejection towards me like they immediately leave if I got near, or scoot their chairs away. I had men flip me off. I have had women be mean to me, but most of the time they leave me alone and have no problem or interest in me. I have men act way more rude to me than women. Guys even act strange when I do hang out with people. If I did have a female friend, it was like their boyfriend was interested in me, in fact I had this woman’s husband show so much interest in me that she looked at me in a wrong way. I didn’t do anything to flirt with him. Luckily, she didn’t hold it against me. I couldn’t hang out with women without them guys acting like look at me, look at me. They also act weird when ever I hang out with very few guys as well. I think other people are noticing it as well. I can go on with this. I’m quiet and am alone a lot. I don’t talk to people or rarely act out. I had a psychic reading done on this and the reason is they don’t like my energy and that it’s closed off. I’m a puzzle to them, so they don’t how to take me. I’m seem to be in my masculine energy and they don’t like that. It’s like I need to be in my masculine energy to protect myself. They have never tried to harm me physically. It feels like they act like mean girls around me. I avoid men because there is nothing I can do. I feel resentful towards them because I feel like this is only happening to me. Women get bullied by other women. This situation is really weird. I need answers.
4 comments
Your question is “Why are guys weird around me?” However, it seems as though you have your answers already: You seem to be largely nonsocial. You mention you are quiet and alone a lot. Understand, through their eyes, you might be the one that appears strange. Not in a bad way necessarily, but in a mysterious way.
You also mention resentment. Addressing it sounds like it will be crucial for you, because if you actively avoid men bc of resentment, then your connections with them cannot improve.
YouTube is a decent resource for researching ways on how to become more effective socially. People like to talk about themselves, so introducing yourself and asking open-ended questions is usually a good way to start conversations.
It’s worth mentioning too that it is okay to be alone. While desiring to improve socially is wonderful, it might be helpful to pair that with improving your relationship with yourself too. With learning to enjoy your own company. When you’re at peace with yourself, you become more magnetic to others, and that will serve you well in the social dept.
Guys can be shallow too, so diet, exercize, hygene, and grooming will improve your chances with then as well, unfortunate truth as that is.
Apologies if what I say is out of turn, but what you’re describing seems to be more of a mixed bag.
Your dad being mean to you has nothing to do with being a man. From your description, he’s mean because he’s a narcissist. Your brother and mother also recognize that. IDK what the issue is of people not believing you is though.
That one boy in High School might have had genuine feelings for you. But also he was a high school boy. He more than likely had no clue on how to process his own emotions, thus he ignored you after confessing. He probably got mad after you gave up, which is definitely on him. High School children in general tend to act stupid and bully each other, especially concerning members of the opposite sex (or members of the sex they are attracted to I guess).
I’m not really sure what to make of it when you say girl’s boyfriends give you a lot of attention. So much so that the girls get mad. Before you were describing situations in which all men were unkind to you and now are describing situations where they were enamored with you. Not saying it doesn’t happen. Just that the switch up confuses me. In this case, it’s on them and says how much they value their relationships.
It’s possible that your more “defensive” nature might tick off a large chunk of men. It feels kinda lazy to say misogyny is to blame, but IDK maybe it’s that simple.
I need to clear things up. Girls don’t get mad at me at all when their boyfriends hit on. The women’s husband he didn’t officially hit on me, but he did show a lot of interest that she gave a negative look when I was driving out, but she didn’t hold it against me. Our relationship was fine, and we never mentioned it. I only met her husband once. I once had a female co-worker bring her boyfriend at a kennel. He wasn’t suppose to there and the whole he talked and been really friendly, but I guess he’s that way. The girl didn’t seem to care. I’ve been hit on by married men and had male strangers look at me while with their girls. I had a couple of girls give a bad look, but they never went after me. I’m someone who minds their own business. It’s really weird. I wonder if they’re trying to put me and another girl against one another. If that’s true, then that’s really ugly. When they have no girl, they’re rude to me. It’s to the point that I want to ask women not to bring their husbands and boyfriends around me, but that would be awkward. I don’t know about the misogyny. I know bad stuff from men happen to other women. I could go on about all these weird situations with men.
I don’t believe you should view men as a whole with this situation. Yea some guys might hit on you and some might even won’t be near you, but that’s only some of them. The guy that avoided u probably got nervous and didn’t know how to tell you his feelings. The guy probably still has a crush on you, but is just nervous. As a guy, this has happened to me. I think anyone can be that way
I’ve had women treat me wrong in the past quite a few times, but I never just said I hated women in general. I met good ones, in between, and some awful ones. In life, you’ll meet a mix of them. Some guys can actual be nice to you. I just think the ones you’re around are in between or bad. Still I’m sorry that you started having that feeling towards men. There was a time I felt women all were the same, but it was much later I found out it wasn’t the case. I hope one day you’ll see not all men can be mean or nasty to you
You seem like someone that’s introverted and enjoys their time alone. It’s not a bad thing. I’m an introvert myself. Not much of a fan of the outside world. Not very social but sometimes. I would say do your own research of the questions you had in this post. I hope this answered ur question in some way ??