This part of me is already dead

She was waiting for some miracle. She was waiting for so long, but nothing have happened. She died.

I do not my intention to be crass, but this might be good news!!!

That little girl waiting on some miracle, for that “some – thing” to magically change, it was time for her to die.

If she is truly dead, resurrection is possible. Not just possible but certain as winter gives birth to spring.
This is the life, death, life cycle; something gives way for the new to arrive. And it will but it must die and sadly most people who lament what has been lost refuse the life, death, life cycle and instead hold on to what was and so remain stuck.

There is a time for everything, as a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child, now the child becomes something more, but only if you let her go.

The Ugly Duckling

“This story is so, so rich for me, so very true for me and extremely validating.
For so long, I felt so different and so “weird”…..so awful, horrible and WRONG that I wasn’t like those around me – it was excruciatingly painful for me. “

“Ahhhh…the “ache” is very real, true and deep. I have felt the ache many times and this beautiful story reminds me that I can trust the ache – the longing for something that just isn’t there…yet. I believe the ache is one of Wild Mother’s ways of guiding me home to my own….both my heart and my own kind.
And! When I arrive – what a glorious feeling of being welcomed home! Of being home among sister (and brother) swans and to be loved and cherished. And when I have been nourished, my wounds bandaged and I’ve been able to rest a while then I am able to join my true family in welcoming, loving and cherishing my sister swans “

“I certainly spent plenty of time wondering why my family members didn’t give me what I needed…and then I did it again with my ex’s family. Sometimes I think that certain members of my family couldn’t deal with their own swanness…so they remained ugly ducklings and tried to convince others that they too were ugly ducklings.”

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On a pond nearby, the water became warmer and the ugly duckling who floated there stretched his wings.

How strong and big his wings were. They lifted him high over the land. From the air he saw the orchards in their white gowns, the farmers plowing, the young of all nature hatching, tumbling, buzzing, and swimming. Also paddling on the pond were three swans, the same beautiful creatures he had seen the autumn before; those that caused his heart to ache. He felt pulled to join them.

What if they act like they like me, and then just as I join them, they fly away laughing? thought the duckling. But he glided down and landed on the pond, his heart beating hard.

As soon as they saw him, the swans began to swim toward him. No doubt I am about to meet my end, thought the duckling, but if I am to be killed, then rather by these beautiful creatures than by hunters, farm wives, or long winters. And he bowed his head to await the blows.

But, la! In the reflection in the water he saw a swan in full dress: snowy plumage, sloe eyes, and all. The ugly duckling did not at first recognize himself, for he looked just like the beautiful strangers, just like those he had admired from afar.

And it turned out that he was one of them after all. His egg had accidentally rolled into a family of ducks. He was a swan, a glorious swan. And for the first time, his own kind came near him and touched him gently and lovingly with their wing tips. They groomed him with their beaks and swam round and round him in greeting.

We are not the same persons this year as last, nor are those we love. It is a happy chance if we, changing, continue to love a changed person.” W. Somerset Maugham

How so very true, how happy chance if, changing, continue to love the change person even when that person is ourselves.