It’s my forgiveness from my dear friend

It’s my forgiveness from my dear friend.

I sent a message to an unknown in facebook. She shared her story and one guy was really troubling her and making her life hell. I felt she is pure and she was tough and caring. I tried to give confident in her and she called me soul mate.  As she was already in depression and she tried to commit suicide once, I never went n meet her just was doing the same and asked her to go to doctor with a friend.  I tried to write for her, some were natural and hoped she may be smiled for those.

A guy works at NGO helped her by getting out from the struggle of this guy. She proposed this guy and she told me about this. They both were having similar thoughts and hobbies.

I told her I love her n I wrote stupid lines, some were in pain and some were in-complete. She told I was nothing and she told I was trying to crack her. By now I lost the comfort of calling her soul-mate but she is really into my heart now, I never lost a feeling for her in-spite of knowing she choose her path. She lied and she tried to keep me away.

She came to my city and she never met by saying I have another feeling for her.  I don’t know what to say to her, she was important in my life. I choose to express myself sometimes through stupid messages to mobile, or to mail. It was not too late to leave her or to hide my feelings for her, but I choose to stay with her.

I wrote stupid lines which made her cry.  She told I believe you as her father, I told he will be her husband. She called me dear friend.

We fought and we cried, n we shared tears, she used to call to middle of night and used cry but we never met each other. She may be beautiful but she is more beautiful the way she behaves and the way she reacts and the way she cares the needy and the way she stays strong. I was selfish and I filled myself with her, I was careless to myself.

I never told her one thing each time she used to cry with me, i wanted to meet her and bring her home and introduce to my mother but all of sudden my mind tells me that she is keeping me away as she already made her choice.

There were so many sleepless nights just spent thinking about her and I was feeling alone all through the way. It’s natural now; just she comes in my mind and thoughts, touches my heart and makes me cry.

It’s too late, it was hard; we stopped talking now; she called me bro and asked me to never to call or message her.

My mind told it will happen but my heart never listened. Still I wake up in the middle of the night and cry; I miss you and you are the most special in my life.

I am not sorry for being fell in love with you and I am not sorry for, you being so special in my life.

I am sorry for not being there for you when you needed, I am sorry for staying weak and staying away from you, I am sorry for making you cry and I am sorry for not keeping your promise not to leave you;