I want to start off with a simple word that does not mean a lot in today’s world and that is “sorry” I am sorry I have let you down. I am sorry I have walked all over you. There is nobody/nothing to blame it is my fault and I accept that. More people than I could count have tried to help me and all I have done is spat in their faces. As I look around I see everybody is moving on. I just stay on this path of nothing. I have given effort to make the right changes but all for nothing because I get swept back to where I was before. I want to first off to say I love you dad you have always been there when I needed you and honestly I took it like it was nothing. I have constantly tortured you with worry and fear and I can’t apologize enought. Brice (my brother) I love you. You are the only reason I am still here. All those years ago we would fight but I knew you loved me. The fist bumps when you would get off the bus really made my world. You have seen me threw this whole ride I call life and you have been the GPS that has lead me down the road but the signal is weak now. I want you to be happy. I want to be at the wedding but I can’t. I am so happy and excited for you and I wish you and Lauren all the best years. I just want you to know it will be ok. Â MoM you raised me for years and gave me some of the best experiences. You took me to my first concert and you taught me how to drive. You sat next to me when I was sick and you always took care of me. I can’t thank you enought. At times I feel like a bourdon on people and is true for the most part I do what I can. If maybe I made the right decisions earlier in life it would not have gotten to this point. Yes I know it’s selfish and people will grieve but I also know that once the grief is gone you move on. You never forget but you accept it. Everybody moves on no matter what and your life will continue like normal. I just wanted to say goodbye and that I love you. I want you to know this was not a quick decision. People always think they know what is the best and most of the time it’s true, this time is different. I love you all and I want you to know I am happy and safe.
A. Acree
5 comments
Are you still around? I want to go too! Let me go with you.
Hope you find peace. Hope you find forgiveness. Hope you are actually happy and safe.
Safe and happy are good. If you want to talk about things i would be happy to lend an ear and shoulder.
I am sure that your family loves you and wants to be with you right now. Can you be with your family right now? Go see them if you can before making such a large decision. You can always talk to me if you want, too, if it would help.
I can be there to hold your hand and we can go thru this together..