All I am doing is praying that I don’t fuck up my next relationship. I’m only two weeks shy of 21 but my past relationships have made me exhausted. I’m starting to not believe in love anymore. I want to get married and have children with the right person but I don’t know how to stop investing in the wrong people
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In a way, I see past relationships as a stepping stone to meeting the right person, and our past experience shapes what we truly value in a future relationship.
We naturally become more adept at seeing the person behind the mask, and possess a greater ability to predict the likely course. Frustratingly, our grasp of what we want is often formed by experiencing what we don’t want. But I think it puts us in a better place to find someone compatible to build a content future with. I know what I look for in the people I let into my life has definitely changed. And I wonder what would’ve been had I possessed the clarity earlier *sigh*
I understand the feelings of exhaustion and of doubt creeping in, they are just awful. But I can promise when you meet the right person one day, those feelings will evaporate. I wish you the best, take care.
NIL mentioned values. This is huge. If you write down your values and internalize them you will learn how to see and discover who shares them. You might even have to reexamine some of them. When you find the mate that shares your values I think you will find your work has only begun and the bond with them will be strong and good and able to withstand some human error along the way.
I am about to end a 9 year relationship with my husband, i probably knew around year 2 or 3 that things weren’t gonna work out but i have an issue that i need to help everyone and he was dealing with a lot then which helped me make excuses for him and then in the blink of an eye i spent 9 years with him and im about to be 31 in March 2020. I feel so old to be starting over, but my best advise would be listen to your gut instincts had i gotten out 6 years ago things would have been so much better for me. and even now the thought of leaving is so terrifying i almost dont want to but then again the thought of staying is even more scary.