Have you ever thought about doing it?

Have you ever thought about doing something so unforgettable?
Something that you cannot fix after pulling the trigger.
This isn’t the kind of thing you can say “I’m sorry” afterwards because if you do it there won’t be nobody to say these words.
Well, what is it? You will have to figure it out since I can’t say those words out loud.
Sometimes I feel that my life is like a graveyard of buried hopes since that’s where all my dreams like to go.
It is getting harder to breath
Harder to sleep
Harder to think
Harder to live
It´s hard for me to explain how I feel but I guess that you would’ve realised by now that it’s no fun.
I feel I’m in conflict with everything
this is something I’ve been feeling a lot lately
I constantly feel out of place
and the things I create are the first to feel the consequences of that
I’m sorry
I wanted to make this happy
To give it a happy ending
but happiness its an unknown thing for me
I don’t know what else to say
I guess I don’t like to write anymore
I don’t like to draw
I don’t like to do any of the things I used to
but this has been happening for a while now
I feel like I am at war with myself
and I’m afraid to tell you that I’m not gonna win.
I am afraid of people finding out the way I feel right now
They would treat me like my dad
When my family found out I could see it in their eyes
All the judgment there was