Hello all.
It’s been a long time since I have postedon here. If you’re a longtime goer of this site, you may remember me.
Just wanted to pop in and say hello again and that I’m still around.
It’s pretty late where I’m located right now. Normal people are sleeping. I should be as well, although I can’t seem to do that at this time. I need to get up for work in about three hours, and if I don’t do that, this day is going to be long, no doubt.
Do you ever feel like the silence is the loudest thing around? I’ve moved to a new area, and hardly know anyone. Sometimes I wish there were someone out there, maybe like a radio Dj, that one could listen to at these odd hours of the evening, and just let everyone know […]
Thought I’d give everyone an update on life.
Got a small band and we have played a show.
Link is here:
I’m the guitarest. Feel free to check out more videos.
I also have a new number, so if anyone here needs to talk, feel free to email and get the number.
I’m trying to keep my days busy and entertained, so I don’t enter a dark place. If I were to say that I don’t have bad days anymore, it would be a lie. They actually happen often, but I try to distract myself from them.
My email: brl.cents@gmail.com
Do you ever feel so empty you don’t know what to do with yourself? Do you ever feel that whenever you try to cheer yourself up, you never can succeed? Do you ever feel like your such a disappointment to the world, because you never can do anything right? Ever feel that you’re not really needed to anyone? Ever feel that you will never find friendship, love, or a true meaning in life? Yeah, this is me. Anyone else?
Haven’t posted in sometime, sorry people.
I wrote this song for the broken people out there.
It’s been posted in mp3 format on sp, but for those who may need encouragement, or for those who may just need to feel that someone cares, this song is for you.
You can always comment, or drop me a line. On my chanel is also a song called in this world, of which has been posted on this site as well, and you can check that one out as well, if you would like.
brl.cents@gmail.com
Yep, subject says it all.
I can’tseem to do anything right. From making friends, to caring about my family, yep, I fail.
I got in a fight with my younger brother, and well, I’m not too violent, but I hit the punk. If I can hit a sibling of mine, how will I treat my future wife or kids? I’d rather not think about that. When I make friends, they always seemed to be troubled, and in the end, bring me down. I feel so awfull, because I can’t even save them. If it is not possible for me to save anyone in life, why […]
One day I’m gonna lose the war. Bradley Nowell, lead singer of one of my favorite bands sang these words. Sublime’s song poolshark is an amazing song I have played on my guitar and sang quite a bit. He was addicted to heroin. he eventually died on May 25, 1996.
I offten find myself singing theese words and thinking to myself, yep, it’s gonna happen to me. I’m going to lose the war, not with drugs, but rather depression. I choose not to drink or do drugs, because I don’t need that.
Today I took a test that once passed, you can graduate from […]
It’s been a week or 2 since I lasst posted, but I figured I would give you all an update. That is, if anyone cares.
So I went to the state tournament. And won, then lost, then won again. At this point, I was one match away from placing in my state tournament. Tough kid I had to take, but I was confident. Anyways, 3, 2, 1, wrestle! So we did, and I was winning for a time, then he got desperate, and I ended up losing.
After that, I cried for a bit. (I know I know, men don’t cry, but since I am […]
I kinda got lucky a few days ago. This being said, I’m now the first blind wrestler in my state that has made it to the state tournament. And a pin, to show it.
Who knows, maybe some girl will magically fall in love with me.
As a cchild, I used to dream of my future. I used to think all of these great things would happen, and that if I tried hard enough, I could be someone. Someone who was one who could make a difference. Not only that, but someone who would be great. Do something amazing, I guess.
But I believe those were dreams, and nothing but.
When I was about 5 or 6, I wanted to be a famous musician. I loved (and still do love) music back then. I wanted to just play piano or sing, get paid for it, and live that glamorous lifestyle. People […]
I have been up since 1:30 am my time. I can’t seem to sleep well at all. Usually for about 3 hours at a time. And it sucks, because later in the day, my body won’t be able to stay awake, and I’ll be trying hard to keep my eyes open. Vacation has ended today, and it’s going to be a long day.
So I’ll try to fall back asleep, yet I can’t. So I’ll read. And no matter what happens in the book, I feel sad when I’m done reading.
Me not sleeping sucks. I’m lonely as can be, and it is […]
Do you ever feel like you are all alone? That while there could be lots around you, you still feel the same? You try to occupy yourself with activities that may bring you pleasure for a short time, but only fail you? Yeah, I feel ya. For these are my feelings now.
I did find something, however that I find slightly soothing, something called first person art. I believe the link is www.firstpersonart.org. There are podcasts there, and one talks about loneliness from a lost love’s point of view, and a radio dj’s point of view. Pretty interesting I’d say, but yet nothing is quite […]
I’m not sure this will work. Perhaps, it is an idea of mine of which is rediculous. But worth a shot, right?
I was on the phone one day talking to a friend, and the question was asked, How do you love yourself? That is a question, I imagine a lot of people may have. I thought about it and an idea came to me. I then presented my friend with this suggestion.
1. Take out a pen or pencel or any other writing tool. A computer doesn’t count as you will need to do this by hand.
2. Take out a piece of paper […]
Most people know how to get in touch with me here. If one is available, I do ask for someone now. Someone who will not judge my feelings, but rather, will listen. Advice is not needed, just someone who cares.
Hey guys,
I’ve been super busy with school and such, sorry about the leaving. I’m here just to see how things are for people. I have heard that there has been a bit of drama on here, which makes me sad, because this should be a safe place for all people. Knowing that there are people who have no consideration of others and their feelings, truly makes me sad.
Anyways, if anyone on here needs someone to talk to, feel free. My email address is: brl.cents@gmail.com
I’m always here for anyone who needs a friend.
My home life really isn’t as bad as some here. But, I’m not going to say it is spactacular, because I would not be telling the truth.
But at home, there is always conflicts. People are always unhappy. And if I want to talk to anyone in my family about my feelings of depression or emptiness or loneliness, they get shoved asside. When I went to the mental home last year and my parents found I was suicidal, it was more like, you’re turning your back on god, or, how could you be so selfish?
I never want to be a greedy person or selfish, […]
People say it’s life, and that whatever life throws at you, take it with ease. But then, they freak out when things do not go their way. I’m refering to my mum here, and others I have known, do the exact same thing, and it bothers me to no end. I mean, I’m not perfect, not perfect at all, but when life throws me curve balls, I try to take it. I won’t always say that I do well, but I try.
Another thing I’d like to mention is love and relationships here. I have seen the way my mum and dad treat each other. […]
Hey guys,
If you have needed someone, I do apologize for not being here much. Recently I have not been feeling so wonderfull mentally, and I have kind of just let life pass me. I know, I should do something, but I feel I am losing strength and energy to live life. Sorry. I do check my emails and if anyone needs to email me to talk, I’m here. I don’t know how much I will be able to do, but I will try.
brl.cents@gmail.com
I try not to post so much on here, but rather lend a helping hand as most of you may know. I don’t like discussing my deep down emotions and such. Yes, if some person makes me mad, I will talk about it, but my feelings about depression, or my loneliness or whatever, I try not to talk about. Why? When you’re a guy, you don’t talk about thoes things. That’s what I was taught, at least. Example being, my sister and I both went through abuse. I remember my mum saying, “Don’t talk about your abuse or suicidal thoughts, it will hurt your sister”. […]
I don’t know why I write, but I do.
For me, I love people so so so much. Most I would do anything for.
But here is my problem.
I’m generally cool with most guys. With women however, I have been hurt by very much so. My family has hurt me, and girls I’ve wanted to be with have lied to me.
So with women, I think, (no offense meant to anyone), that most are evil.
Either I get way too attached to one, or don’t attach myself at all. Lately I feel as if I’ve been getting too attached and feeling like I have […]
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