Thinking about suicide everyday…thats where I am in life now. Smoking when I’m not always on the move, smoking when I am on the move, thinking about suicide during it all…. I can’t just sit by and feel this hurt anymore. I can’t let those around me shove me towards progress when I’m just getting worse. They don’t understand how hard it is for me…how hurt I am… All they care about is that in the next month I am better. That’s how its been told to me. I don’t need sympathy or pity. I just want death.
I have decided that its my time to take a break. I’m taking a break from just everything. If you thought I was reckless before then now is the time to let go. I’m done with it all. IÂ will try suicide again. I will do whatever the hell I want because I’m dying anyway…so what the hell does it matter anymore? All the friends that I have (which is few to none) don’t even know. My life is so useless…I deserve all that came towards me in the past couple years. I deserve the pain. But now I can’t fight it anymore so I’m giving […]
So I was thinking a lot about my life…and how it turned out so far. Everyone that I know thinks I live such a good life, or atleast should. I have such a nice house, live in literally the nicest neighboorhood, have two parents, perfect grades, colleges asking ME to apply to THEM, own my own car, work at an IT job that pays a lot, have perfect skin….
And yet that brings me no joy, I’m missing the happiness from it all. I don’t want that. What am I leaving out from what I already said? Oh yeah…how I was raised in the hood, or […]
I just lost someone that was so fuckin special to me. I’m crying and I’m gonna find some way to make myself feel better. I think I may do alot of burning and cutting. JUst went out and bought tons of razors and I have a whole bag of weed in my room just calling my name because what else is there for me now. Maybe I’ll go for a little joy ride in a parking lot and end up in a tree. Wouldn’t that be nice? To end up dead after everything I’ve been through. All the abuse and hurt and pain. Just end […]
I’m gonna go away for a while I think. I don’t know when Ill be back or if I will be back. I can’t take everything going on and everyone is so caught up in stupid drama to help. (And the drama I’m referring to is NOT suicide or personal troubles) I just can’t take this anymore. I think I might just be going insane, losing it….falling apart. I have been hurt and destroyed and now I’m crushed. So I just need to go…
I can’t handle the overwhelming feeling I have now. I’m in a very bad place right now and lately things are just getting worse.
My best friend is having seizures in front of me, my other friend is cutting all the time, and I lost the one person I fell in love with….
I just can’t handle it. I’m not ok and I’m not gonna pretend I am. I just don’t know what to do anymore.
I can’t do this anymore. I feel so….out of place and so fuckin depressed. Everything is going down hill for me yet again and I can’t handle it. I can’t be strong and I can’t pretend anymore. I think tonight might be my last night. I’m ready to go. I’m ready to disappear. No one will hear from me for a while I hope. I can’t handle the pain I’m in and uphold a happy face anymore. It hurts too much. And I can’t let them lock me up. This might just be goodbye.
This place is so different. I haven’t been on in so long but everything has changed. This place used to be the best place to come when I was suicidal or something but now….now everyone just judges and has an enormous attitude. I hate it here now. All the people the I knew on here are gone. Posts have changed….rules have changed. It makes me so sad to think that this place will never be the same.
Hey. It has been a while since I checked in. I’m still here if anyone cares but not for long. I finally was able to get a blade. I have a stash of my attempts. I have been in total suffering for the past two weeks. My life is done. All it is now is rebeling and partying. What kind of life is that with deression on top. So much pain and I’m so tired of it. Depression is constantly there, waving at me, screwing with my friendships and relationships. Depression won’t leave me alone. I’m so tired of fighting. I give up. Goodbye those […]
Does anyone burn themselves? Please if you have respond.
I’m high and really suicidal right now. I think I’m gonna go and find something to kill myself with. That or plan to. I’m a wretch and I lose all my friends. I don’t deserve to live nor do I want to live. To much hurt and pain.
Does anyone want to talk to a lonely, depressed, high girl right now?
Tonight I feel the same way I did last week. Very low and super depressed. I’m depressed everyday but not like this. Everytime I cut and I think why am I continuing in this life when all I ever feel is pain and sorrow and worthlessness? Why do I keep on when I continue to feel this way. How many more times will this happen before I truely decide to try to kill myself again? Will tonight be the last time? I’m so sick of thinking that if I get through tonight it willl get better. Because that psychology doesn’t work since I’m back to […]
So here’s a question for those who know about cutting. Does the depth of the cut depend on the knife or blade that you use? I use a small blade from a sharpener and I bleed A LOT. Does using a steak knife make the wounds worse? Or can you make just as deep a cut using a small blade? Also I cut on my waist where no one can see it…if I cut so deep would it be harder to get stitches? And is there an artery that I should be careful of???
I’m high and I cut myself very deep. I don’t know what to do!
I am a worthless piece of trash. I do everything wrong even when I don’t mean to. I hurt people, I hurt them badly. And either I can’t say I’m sorry or they don’t believe me. I can do nothing right ever. I feel so horrible right now. I want to tell everyone that I’m sorry…I just can’t handle myself. I’m so sorry.
This is for anyone who wants to talk and especially for Nobody915 since we have a lot of catching up to do!
I’m bored and depressed and I feel like I’m gonna do something really stupid soon.
Probably cut really bad like last night, bleeding just wouldn’t stop. That or sneak out and do dope. I don’t know.
I’m lonely and curious right now. Does anyone live in New York? I know, weird question.
This song describes my life and how I feel to the exact point. It hurts to see my life in a song and to realize how screwed up my life is and how screwed up I am.
Nobody hears me when I cry, that is when I do cry. Nobody hears, and nobody cares.
Isn’t it funny how my mom says she loves me but all she does is criticise me? Funny when she finds out that I tried killing myself she yells at me?
Is it really my fault that when I hate my house so much that it is horrible for me to want to move out? Is it really my fault that CPS got called because my stepdad tackled me and I blacked out?
I don’t talk to my mom or stepdad, I don’t want them touching me or pretending that everything is ok. I want out. Is it really that weird that I’m rebelling against them? I […]