I have mostly been unable to maintain the most important relationships to me. My destructiveness has driven my closest friends away from me. I realize this has been true for all of my life.
I’ve always contemplated suicide. I was ready to commit suicide when I was a teenager in high school, but my older brother  committed suicide before me. I saw the pain my family members went through, and I felt I couldn’t ever do it. It’s been years since then. I was 16 at the time. I’m 22 now… I don’t feel too sorry about what happened to him. That’s a whole other story. […]