Jay3312

Why can’t i just let go? I hate it here in my life that has no effect on the people of this world?
I walked home from soccer last night to come home to my dad yelling at me he threw open my door ( which left a hole in my wall) and then pushed me into my dresser ( spilling all my stuff on the floor), i was also left with bruises. He yelled at me some more and left my room. I then shut my door and began to pick up all the stuff that fell. I started crying for the first time since […]

So lately i have noticed some things that are a little shocking. I have decided they are a result from all the rubbing alcohol i drank a few months ago.  Um so the stuff that’s been happening includes,    Me being slower and weaker, the inside of my mouth peeling, constant headaches, and my blood and sometimes just my skin has a little bit of the smell of rubbing alcohol. I am still fighting with the hell in my head. I have too much going on to focus on it right now and control my madness inside. Sorry if this is scary i don’t want to to get the […]

Well this week has been hell. i just moved and im so alone.  I so confused about everything. And not only was the week hell i had to go through it without a blade. I lost mine. so a few days ago i burned my right thigh three times. I’ll be honest with you it hurt like a mother. but today i told my parents i was going for a bike ride and i’ll be back in a few. and then i just left. and i rode my bike a cross town went to walmart and bought two red pencils, 5 pens, and a little […]

After i asked her out my life got worse, because she told the school counselors about all my depression stuff, and that i tried to kill myself the night before and right before her and her friends told the counselors i told them when i want help I’LL get it but no i had to spend two fucking hours with some annoying old people wanting to know about my business (again).  then right when i saw tayler (the girl from before) i cussed her out and asked her why the F*** did she do the one thing i asked her not to do i just ugh it was like […]

Yeah so this is the little intro to the second “What you missed” it’s just what happened while i was gone of the site for a few months.

Day#6
so my friend likes tayler to like a lot. he’s not really my friend but he told me he liked her so now if i asked her out i would feel kinda bad. but me and tayler shared hot chocolate

Day#7
so i decided skrew it i want to date tayler so im going to and i asked her out and she said yes i havent been this happy since my last girlfriend.

Day#8 i actually skipped a few […]

well basically um, my live is a bag of dog shit. but eh im not the only one. so um this is just me trying to pick up where i left off a few months ago.enjoy i guess.

Day #1
So im pretty confused im a mess and i just can’t handle myself anymore if i stay like this im going to go crazy and just hold it in for the rest of my life and life alone in the dark. Or im going to try and kill myself over and over until i die.

Day#2
So this girl i like asked me to go to the movies with […]

Last week was horrible. I thought my life was over. I don’t know why it came to this but I could guess it was that  I just had enough of life. I wanted nothing more than to die. Sure I felt bad for the three people that I actually cared if I hurt them ,but once it was done there would be no turning back sure they might get hurt but that would pass. If you saw me now you would think I was lying. At the time I look happy but it’s all an act for the sake of my little brother who happens […]

I tried it again. By it i mean suicide. It want to die put i care about two people  a lot so i just can’t do that to them. It would be wrong and hurt them deeply. I want to die peacefully. I drank some rubbing alcohol last night. I hoped i wouldn’t wake up this morning. I feel really sick. I almost puked it tasted disgusting. I cut my wrist because i was mad i wasn’t dead. I might try again if i don’t die by Wednesday. I haven’t been eating because it hurts my stomach. well that’s all i have to say about my life. It helps […]

Physical pain isn’t that bad what really messes a person up is emotional or mental pain. I started cutting again and I’m going to burn my wrists again to night i’m scared of myself and i don’t know what to do i want to overdose or poison myself. i just need help. from some one or any one. i’m desperate to stop myself from doing the unthinkable. Well unthinkable to regular boring people. well that’s all i have to say at the moment if you want to help just reading comments calms me down and makes me think less of death and pain.