Author

YoungGods

If you ever feel like talking, contact me @ sp.younggods@gmail I like talking to new people :)

2 months

by YoungGods 12/8/2017

written by YoungGods

almost 2 months ago I got a call at around 2 or 3 a.m. and i didn’t answer it. But a few hours later my mom texts me and says my uncle has been murdered, shot from behind straight through the head, died instantly.

I hardly knew him but I felt different. I can’t explain it. Sad…maybe. But all my aunts and uncles who were family to him, they were beyond sad. Mourning. My culture takes funerals differently. 3 days of a type of funeral, 3 days I saw his body and only once did I cry. I thought to myself do I not have empathy? […]

12/8/2017 9 comments

crash

by YoungGods 12/8/2017

written by YoungGods

Do you ever hear a song that just makes you want to cry? and worse for no reason? I found that song today. Its called Crash by EDEN. (First off EDEN is my all time favorite) But whoever listens to it/watches the video what are your opinions on it? What are some songs that make you feel the same way this song does to me?

Sincerely,

12/8/2017 11 comments

vertigo

by YoungGods 11/30/2017

written by YoungGods

today just wasn’t a good day. i wish i had someone to talk to, i’m not comfortable with my friends sometimes. i’m just ready to sleep.

// anything good happen to someone else?

11/30/2017 2 comments

11/26/17

by YoungGods 11/26/2017

written by YoungGods

it’s been over a year since i last post… honestly i forgot about this place until tonight. it’s been up and down a lot since but recently my stress and i guess depression has skyrocketed over very little things. tonight my mom got really angry with me and started cussing at me for the littlest of things and when i finally got to my room i blew up. i couldn’t breathe, i cried so hard and i gripped my arms so tightly with my nails that i broke skin and left my arms red. this has happened a lot, i get angry emotional. i refuse to […]

11/26/2017 3 comments

Feelings

by YoungGods 11/10/2016

written by YoungGods

It’s been awhile but like I said before I only will post when I’m down. So here I am once more. Well firstly, I’ve been talking with this boy who doesn’t live in my country and man I’m falling for him hard. I hate it. I don’t believe in his feelings back to me. I know he doesn’t have a perfect family and personal life but he gets moody and distant and it hurts me ‘cos I want him to trust me and talk to me. I’m tired of being lead along then having my feelings hurt later. But oh well. I just need to rant/talk […]

11/10/2016 3 comments

Distrust

by YoungGods 5/10/2016

written by YoungGods

If my parents ever divorced I wouldn’t be able to choose which one I’d live with. So from my previous post not long ago this memory came to me. My dad and I were in the parking lot at a restaurant about to go inside when my mom called in. I don’t remember what they talked about but when my dad hung up he was pissed. He asked me if I would want to go on a trip with him, England exactly, just him and me. I didn’t say anything. I didn’t know why he was saying it. But it hurt. Did he want to […]

5/10/2016 3 comments

5/10/16

by YoungGods 5/10/2016

written by YoungGods

Hello,

It’s been awhile. I’m doing alright, I think. Do you ever just lay down and think of all the bad things? Then it takes forever for those thoughts to die down just quiet enough to sleep decently. Past few days I haven’t slept well. I hate this feeling. One second I’m perfectly fine. Next second everything changes. Questions flood my mind. I get this blank feeling spreading across my chest, almost like its trying to take over. Ways to prevent me from moving on. It really sucks when I don’t cry. I just sit here for minutes to hours doing nothing but thinking. If I […]

5/10/2016 2 comments

4/6/16

by YoungGods 4/6/2016

written by YoungGods

So I told a friend abut my family problems. I don’t know if it was good or bad to. We were talking about our lives and things going on and it slipped out… She didn’t say anything to comfort me which I wished she did because it’s still quite a new pain. But she talked to me how she is going through some semi-similar stuff too. In the end, I don’t know. I regret mentioning it kind of. I’ve only mentioned it on SP and it feels weird to have actually talked it out. Anyways how is everyone else? I hope everyone is doing well, […]

4/6/2016 2 comments

I hate my body

by YoungGods 3/31/2016

written by YoungGods

Prom is coming up. My stress is through the roof already and now this? I bought a dress back in January and never had time to go get it tailored, so today I went by a shop and they said they can’t fix it. The tailor told me to go through her catalog of dresses and so I did. But I like seeing how the dress really looks on me. Plus I’m definitely not the skinniest in the world so not all the dressss came in my measurements. My waist is a lot smaller than my bust/hip and they’re at odd numbers so it was […]

3/31/2016 9 comments

Been Awhile

by YoungGods 3/25/2016

written by YoungGods

I feel kind of embarrassed for coming back here. It’s been at least two or three months since I wrote anything or even read other’s thoughts. I thought I was feeling better and didn’t need to come back here and I was going to delete this account and act as if I never belonged here. I’m glad I didn’t delete it. For the past few months things have been going fine. I finished a few online classes and been more social. Thing is, I still feel lonely. In the beginning of March my grade went on a trip and I bunked with three other friends. […]

3/25/2016 8 comments

Thinking Ahead

by YoungGods 1/4/2016

written by YoungGods

It’s getting closer and closer to the end of the academic school year for me and I need to be focusing on careers and colleges. I should be choosing one or the other by the end of the school term so that the next two years will be college courses focusing in my major. But I don’t know what I want to do. Obviously I need to go to a college since I’m in the early college program or what would be the point in being here? I’ve messaged a few cousins and classmates about what they want to do after graduating and it seems […]

1/4/2016 5 comments

Break Time

by YoungGods 12/17/2015

written by YoungGods

So I haven’t been on in a while because of school testing. But I’m glad that is over now and I think I did horrible on my physics but pretty good in my Psychology and English courses. So a lot of stress had lifted off my shoulders but now that I’m on holiday break I have to be around my family for about two weeks. I do not look forward to… I haven’t really been talking to people much either the past week and I’m okay with that. Makes me less tense I think and I haven’t cried in a few days either so I […]

12/17/2015 1 comment

Losing friends

by YoungGods 12/13/2015

written by YoungGods

So my friend had a boyfriend who used her in so many ways. And they’ve been going out on and off for many years (3 or 4 years?) So about a week or two ago he shows up at her house after a few good months and they get back together and now I feel totally betrayed. I helped her get over him and I was even there when she broke it off with him. He is toxic. He does drugs, drinks, and is a compulsive liar to everyone. He has even been in jail. I wasn’t even surprised they got back together after my […]

12/13/2015 3 comments

Quietness

by YoungGods 12/12/2015

written by YoungGods

My weekend so far has been okay besides last night when I pretty much cried myself to sleep. I honestly couldn’t tell you why I did that. Is that weird or like odd? But the good thing was that no one was home because it wasn’t a very good break down. It lasted for a few hours. I had no internet/TV, or family around so I guess the quietness and loneliness got to me? I’m used to loneliness in my house but quietness I can’t deal with lately. I’ve noticed I’ve been listening to music a lot more just to make my house seem more…alive.

Besides […]

12/12/2015 1 comment

What a sucky day

by YoungGods 12/10/2015

written by YoungGods

I can’t stand it when my mom comes home. She is usually home 2-3 days a week. She always has something bad to say to me. Today I mentioned to my parents about a stomach pain that’s been happening for almost a week now. And she told me I’m faking it. Its nothing. Just take some zantac etc. I’ve had stomach problems for the last two months on and off and still haven’t been to the doctors. My dad finally spoke up and said maybe I should go to the doctor. Anyways my mom…honestly sucks. She never has anything nice to say about me. It’s […]

12/10/2015 2 comments

Second Post

by YoungGods 12/9/2015

written by YoungGods

I honestly don’t know. I feel like I’m losing my friends all over. I try to help a few friends struggling with school and stuff but I still feel worthless. It’s worse when they make fun of me for trying to help. “This isn’t you” blah blah
I even told them it’s because you don’t really know me and they just give me this look like I’m crazy. I absolutely hate it when they compare me to someone bad. My mom isn’t the greatest mom and she’s never home. The other day a so called friend said I’ll end up just like her […]

12/9/2015 4 comments

Just Nothings

by YoungGods 12/6/2015

written by YoungGods

Sometimes I feel like I’m going crazy or something is wrong with me. Most days are okay in the beginning. Then something small changes and I fell like it comes crashing and spiraling down again. That sadness that follows me is back and it’s like it grabs a hold of me for the longest of time. It doesn’t go away until I’ve cried so long that my eyes, head, throat, and body hurt. I feel like I’ve lost my friends and family within that past two years. It’s getting harder and harder to open up to anyone. My family seems like it’s falling apart. I’m […]

12/6/2015 2 comments