General

Lol. I mean it’s just a thought. My last post here was months ago because i thought i was doing fine. But I’m Defenitley not. At lease not anymore anyways. All my thoughts keep coming back, im suppose to be free from them, but they keep re-appearing in my mind. The bullying, the lonlieness, being a failure. Just everything. I thought I was fine, because I told myself I’m going to get prettier, and i’ll be in college and everything will get better. But no. Nothing has gotten better. I thought for sure I’d have a boyfriend by now. I don’t know why I thought […]

I’ve been sick. I couldn’t and still can’t go to school, I can’t eat, I can’t sleep and I can barely function. It’s all thanks to a stupid stomach bug.. well at least I think it is. The doctors seem to think it’s something else, but they can’t agree on what. Some say it’s just a stress ulcer, some think it’s something to do with gore bladder and others think it’s a whole range of things. Either way they think they’ll have the results by this afternoon. I hope they’re right. All this pain is unbearable, and that’s not to mention the stress I’ll be […]

I mean.. I never expected for me to end up this way… Who would have thought sweet little Zoe is sad all the time.. who would have thought she can rip a razor apart in seconds and bring a blade to her skin.. who would have thought she thinks about killing herself.. who would have thought? Oh thats right nobody.. and I honestly am having a hard time coping.. with all that life brings me. Im always alone, moms not home.. all I do is get stoned and work at a fast food resteraunt.. I wish I were never born.. or even if no body […]

I’m done feeling tired and sad all the time. I still laugh when I see Tosh.0, but people don’t understand that I’m not okay even if I do laugh at that. People just don’t understand that the way I act around people is different from the way I feel. I’m not pretty and I wish people would stop saying that I am because I can’t stand them lying to me.

I’m done. I’m done being the fat girl. I’m done being the girl who really does try to lose weight and successfully loses 20 pounds but still doesn’t think they are pretty. I hate choosing not […]

I am sick of my mom making me feel like shit the yelling and arguing she does really hurts she is pushing me towards the end of my rope. I am writing this from my phone because we are in the car and we just had our fight I have been cutting my self more and more recently…. My ex or bf or what ever he is said to stop cutting or he is going to be really mad and stop talking to me… He cares about me ik that he kissed me today and honesty he still doesn’tknow what to do… I want to […]

I have a great life now and an amazing wife but I don’t deserve it any of it I just sit awake at night and deny my self food and water because I don’t think I should be aloud to have things I need  I love my wife sometimes I catch myself smiling and I think how dare you smile your worthless nothing you deserve to me punched and hit burned stabbed and just anything to cause me to hurt and know how much of a scew up

If you dont want to live, dont. Its your choice and noone has to live if they dont want to , life is ugly anf has too much bad in it. I just want to have fun but its hard when your poor so i want to fucking die but its hard. life is soooo trippy i just want to know what happens after life! i hope theres complete nothingness. ahhhhh

I realize that I’ve offended some of you.  I apologize, I only wish to inspire some “fight” in you, as it is needed to provide change. I realize that I’ve covered a lot of material.  I’ve received replies that range across the board from positive to negative.   I feel the most important replies were inquiries.  “What does this have to do with me?”   “What do you expect us to do about it?”  I would attempt to explain, but a picture is worth a thousand words and an editor is worth even more, so I ask for a few more moments of your time to watch […]

i have been having some terrible thoughts and they show up on everything i do. my mind is now my worst enemy… it brings so much pain into my life and i never wished to keep living but yet i do… each and every day. should it be considered inhumane to keep someone who can’t live with the pain they face to continue living? i know that i hate waking up each morning and facing the world as if there was nothing wrong with me and that i can bear everything that comes my way. as of right now i would love to go to […]

I don’t really know or care if people before me have had an idea about a mass suicide to end all humanity. I just thought it up as an idea a week ago and have since been fascinated by it. The world is on the downward turn. It has been for many years. Many people focus only on the material things. We as humans focus on our housing and our cars and our flat screen TV’s. We focus on money and how to make money and the amazing amount of shit we have to go through in order to obtain degrees and prestige in order […]

i am not asking to be judged,or told if its right or wrong,i am asking in my shoes what you think is worse,,,,,if sombody hurt you really bad,and they walked out of your life,then down the road,they wanted to come back in your life,what would hurt more,if you were them,if you didnt even acknoloage the person that hurt you,not even respond,or tell them how they are fake and you will never trust them again,and ask them if you are the only one they hurt and lied to,then tell them to stay the fuck away from you and tell them they are dead to you,???

Hello everyone, I posted “Depressed Psycho, I guess” the other day. Mind if I keep a daily posting here for quite a bit?

Today.. I took a shower, and all I thought about was death. Macabre. And sex. I chuckle at myself for thinking of cruel things and lust, but I have no clue why. A woman has been harassing me about my religion and self esteem. I want to really kill her — but I can’t. Now, I am a precise person. I have a strength for… striving for perfection? When people excel over me, I have a deep furious anger, even if it is something […]

I finally got a job yesterday. I’m kinda excited, but I know the feeling won’t last, so it’s hard. I just gotta get out of here and maybe things will get better.

How is everyone’s day going?

i have been so depressed the past few days and all i feel is extreme sadness. i hate not feeling anything else. all i ever feel is sad and empty. i hate that everyday i have to fight myself just to stay alive… and its so hard to do especially when everyone at home refuses to listen to me. i can say anything and they won’t even recognize i’m talking… so most of the time i avoid them or i don’t even say a word because apparently what i have to say is not important. one day i’ll just break and be gone and they’ll […]

after my mom saw a suicidal note on my private Facebook support group. she took me to a doctor when i turned 18 and told the doctor about the event. it made me mad at first but it was the right thing for me. it takes about a month for it to fully take effect but once it does it makes your tolerance to sin and just bullshit in general so much better. my problem is really rare just because of how stupid my problems really are. in a way they still get to me but not as much. I’m really anti social and have […]