One shot, that is all I needed when I bought this gun. This time it was real. I didn’t think about taking it too far. This was for me, to end my pain and misery. It was 1996, the year that I hit rock bottom and there was no drugs or alcohol involved. It was severe depression. It was that year as it’s said “the love of my life†and I broke up. But the worst was yet to come. My Grandfather was dying. A man who showed me things in life that never would have been possible for me to learn since my father […]
Stories of Hope
Please allow me to write some Words in German – because thats the only way I am sure, I can express myself in the most accurat way possible:
Egal wie alleine und einsam ich mir vorkomme. Wenn ich hier einige Gedanken von anderen Menschen lese, dann begreife ich, dass viele in ähnlicher Art und Weise leiden und das gleiche denken. Damit sind wir wenigstens gemeinsam einsam.
Es macht mich sehr traurig, dass es so viel Leid auf der Welt gibt. Leid ist eine subjektive Empfindung, so ist bereits auf Wikipedia zu lesen. Dennoch gibt es Arschlöcher, genannt “Freunde und Familie”, die einem sagen “Kopf hoch.” , “Leben […]
I am thankful for my misery when it is consistent, because I already do not feel I deserve what I have, and can only see my life getting worse.
I havent posted for a while and i thought i should start again. so I broke up with my boyfriend and I started self harming again. I stopped eating and cried a lot. One of my mates who I loved asked me out 3 weeks later. That was about a week ago. But I feel like I still have feelings for my ex which is hard because I really badly love my new bf. The stress and emotions are starting to take over me physically and mentally. During this week alone I have punched 2 students, threatened a teacher, punched the walls of the […]
I was assigned a short writing piece to describe an event in my life that made me who I am today. This story is true, and while it ends on a hopeful note, this doesn’t mean that I still don’t have apathetic feelings, it’s just that now I have a way of dealing with them. I found this site as I was typing in questions into google, hoping beyond hope that I’d find something worthwhile. I did. An online community of people that are all struggling. I hope you enjoy this and forget your troubles if for just a short while.
I’ve found that life […]
this may seem really weird, but im actually really excited to die. im counting down the seconds until i will have gone 10 days with out food or water. the only thing that i am kind of feeling iffy about is the fact that im goin to die fat. that really pisses me off big time. i dont know why, but i just really really want to die, it has become a lust, a desire, and an obsession.
I will write to you this faithful poem, hope and peace are many things so far.
Loving, caring, praying, are the thing joyful in many ways. I see your face telling me these things, so I’ll try to do my best.
When I walk into this room, you are the one who I see, whom seems to smile, even with all the troubles running wild.
Hark the sound of angels singing, hark the sound of God! For he is always there for you and me so shall we sing, so peacefully.
I walked towards you too, seeing your face reminds me of so many thing, the hope you gave […]
Note: This is my personal experience and I tried to explain everything I could, I could explain better but I’m not a writer,I’ll write whatever comes in my mind and sorry for the English grammar mistakes 🙂 So, let me show you how to die without pain, it works 100% and I know it is going to be a long article (may be) but it worth reading. 🙂 I’m not here to waste your time or make you feel bad, I want to show you, how […]
I’m not afraid of being laughed at. I just think that, even if I do my best now, I still may not be able to reach my goal. No… I know the chance of success is way too low. Knowing that, why would I even try?! Why don’t I just living my life like this ’till the end?
I’m looking for a GirlFriend! I’m 23 years old boy, so lonely! We can be together forever!
Hello, there. I know life has become so bad, but we can be together forever. No one cared about you but I’ll care for you. You’ve gone into a deep depression and I can help you to get out of your depression and I can make your life happy 🙂
I need a girl’s friendship. I’m just a normal boy looking for someone special in my life! I don’t know if I can find someone to talk to. Even if My life was perfect it was like mess for me, I was depressed too but I learned to getup and change my life. My life is […]
No one sees me falling
No one sees me dying
No one sees me crying.
Not even the rain.
I’m tired, overwhelmed, uninspired, afraid, hurting, uninspired and I don’t know how to get past it. I might not even know what it is I’m trying to get past. I try something new only to spin my wheels. I’m living my life on repeat, with the same worn out patterns and themes playing again and again.
If suicidal thoughts are to be replaced with thought of life, a new thought system must be utilized; one with a new focus and a new goal. Such is A Course in Miracles. It is flexible, in that, it sees you where you are, as you are, as well as where you could be without the thought of death. It provides a workbook of lessons to train the student in how the shift of perception can be made. It does not force, but enables. It does not appeal to everyone, though it has a profound effect on those whom find it appealing. Here is the […]
“All my life I’ve tried to put it from me, saying Vladimir, be reasonable, you haven’t yet tried everything.”
A little story, maybe a little hope.
Hi. I’m sorry for my English. I’ll try to make myself understandable. The reason that I’ve came back here to write this is that I’m feeling well. And I want to share this here.
Since my youth, since I had 8 or 9 years, I have suicide thoughts. Jumping was always my “favoriteâ€. Like the way it looks, flying for freedom, forever freedom. I’m, obviously, an atheist. Don’t believe in anything that will punish or save me. I’m all by myself, I was born naked and lonely, and I live and always will live naked and lonely, despite of the […]
I’m at the point where I can’t make a difference between right or wrong since I fight the urge to accept that controlling someone’s else life is a right thing to do.
What if this were true?
“Forgiveness is the key to happiness.
Here is the answer to your search for peace. Here is the key to meaning in a world that seems to make no sense. Here is the way to safety in apparent dangers that appear to threaten you at every turn, and bring uncertainty to all your hopes of ever finding quietness and peace. Here are all questions answered; here the end of all uncertainty ensured at last.â€
If this were true, there would be no more uncertainty about where to focus your efforts or how your time could best be spent. If to forgive is divine, there […]
Let’s be honest about it.  The story line on this site is pretty much dominated by the sentiment that hurting one’s self is desirable or at least inescapable. Neither of these things is true, but there is value in admitting the obvious. There is also advantage in admitting that no one, however vehement their claimed desire for death, is completely enthusiastic about the prospect.
There is a way out of this self-defeating cycle of fear, hatred and guilt. It is forgiveness.
Everyone has felt that they have suffered at some point or other. How do some manage to continue on without being paralyzed, while others never recover […]
I’ve got iron over my heart. Â They see the tattered sweater.
I’ve got a wonderful smile. They see a messed up child.
I try to understand where they are coming from. But I can’t.
How dare they make up a quirk in exchange for a good trait.
Maybe it’s all in my head.
Maybe I should let it go like everyone says to.
I can’t stop the feeling i’ve been hiding like almost a year. Is haunting me again; i thought it was in the past. But i was lying to myself, even tho everyday i think about it for a minute, is part of my everyday memories and feelings; Â it comes back at night like a nightmare. I can’t control it, maybe is a sign that, it still remains to let me know that it’s not dead at all. That i can still save it. Save us. It won’t leave my head. That’s why i stay here.
“Although depression can occur at any age, it affects teens more than younger children. Depressive symptoms may start appearing around age 13, and often peaks between 16 and 24. Yet depression can be difficult to diagnose in young people, because symptoms seldom involve mood alone. One study concluded that fewer than half of teen patients suffered mainly from depressive symptoms. More often, they developed a mix of mood and behavioral problems, for example, agitation, anxiety, attention difficulties, or defiant behaviors.”
© 1998-2013 Mayo Foundation for Medical Education […]