We dated for awhile then we were just friends things got messed up we hurt each other helped each other we met on here and you’ve been wanting to die just like I before we ever met I think. You really did it this time and i hope you didn’t im crying so hard I know you were in so much pain and I couldn’t fix you I tried so fucking hard and you even said you can’t be fixed I love you I hope you’re feeling peace for once

My darkness rises with the moon.

Every night I live the same war.

To cut or not to cut. (Sorry, I’m a Shakespearean geek)

But I know that it’s never really a question.

I can picture the blood, feel the burn,  and I know it’s coming and that I can’t stop it.

It should probably scare me, or at least make me feel a little nauseous.

But as usual, I feel nothing.

I know the blood will set me free.

At least until the moon visits again.

Life was always shit. I wish i just got cancer, but of course i have to slowly become a vegetable. How can even shit like neurological ilness exist, i would abort myself on the first day if i knew about it. I’m surrounded by trash that live like they can’t do anything and that’s really annoying. Retards don’t know how it feels to become dead alive. Doctors are funny as well, takes 2 simple tests to confirm the sickness and it takes a year to do anything.
I’m so tired of this bullshit, fuck your school, your work and your pathetic lives. I’m not going […]

Just in case if I actually go through with it. This is my chance to say Goodbye to all SP members, have a great life ahead of you. You’re loving and caring people, you’re there for people when nobody else might not be there for him\her

Help me.

I need to get this off my chest.

I think of suicide.

I’m not old but not young and I work as a suicide/crisis counselor. I deal each and every day with people who are hurting, alone and pain-ridden. People who need. And all of them want help. Want peace. Want someone to tell them they will be okay. That the day gets brighter. Just like me. I see as many as 18 separate people a day. I see snapshots of people’s worlds and realities. Of short comings, of emotional issues, of pain they’ve caused themselves or others have caused them. When you speak to someone […]

why do i feel so bad? my life is perfect so why do i want to see all the pain ooze out of my wrists? i love my girlfriend and shes why im alive, yet i beg for the feeling of not feeling anything. should i man up an live with it and keep it hidden or tell her my pain? why do they tell you it will all be ok when you get help? that the magic pills will save you? that the people will remember and continue to care when they eventually forget? why?

Do what your supposed to do all day long; job, education or whatever else. You do it because society wants you to do it. There’s no true freedom if you’re told from the first second you’re on this earth that your life is already planned out ahead of you and you only have to live through it and then die.

Freedom means creativity, means purpose in doing something. A true act of freedom is drawing a sunflower on the back of the essay you’re working on, is wearing a pink hoodie to your bank appointment, is going to sleep without setting the alarm, is saying hi […]

know of any other websites similair to this one? or one that methods can be discussed? how about any books like final exit?

Then you left, showed me truth.

And told me to get over it.

With that knowledge, I can become such a spiteful person.

Or become a mindless drone living day to day with no real care.

Some just realize it sooner than others.

~BehindTheSmile~

I am sad to announce that, I am effectively going to end my life soon.
I don’t feel the need like to continue living, I don’t feel the need to continue worrying about anything. I am not going to talk about why I am going to end up my life, but just wanting to make you know is because I just can’t continue having pain.
I am going to leave everything, I don’t know how I am going to do it, but this is the last time i touch a keyboard; this is the last time i touch anything.
I am fucking annoyed of everyone […]

My boyfriend fell out with me for no reason so i did the typical girlfriend thing and tried to be cute and annoying to get him to talk to me. It ended in him constantly pushing and kicking me.. so i pushed him back with my foot and then he full scale punched me in the back.. it’s only been 2 months.. what have i done?

I used to believe anything was possible. Straight A’s. Got into a good university fresh from high school.

I always wanted to cure the acne scars on my face. I thought no man would love me with these scars. So I paid for a laser treatment. It did not make things better, it made things worse. Now half of my face is beautiful and untouched and the other, treated half is ruined. I can’t help but think this affects everything people think about me. The bad half of my face makes me looks sloppy, stupid and trollish.

Worse yet, it is all my fault. And so are […]

I’ve realized that nothing amuses me or makes me happy. My life is becoming a boring routine. I’m in college and yes, I have different classes every day but it’s all the same to me.

Today, I woke up at 5:20. I don’t drive so I have to rely on someone who has their own business to drop me off. I went to class, where I almost fell asleep in. Now I have this huge gap, 4 hours, until my last class. I have no friends here. I don’t talk to anyone. I don’t mind it but it gets boring. Then I’ll most likely go […]

Sometimes I really wish to disappear for a while

I feel so lonely . Not really that I have no friends

its that I think no one will devote all of them for me

i am willing to prepare and spend a lot of effort for my beloved ones . But I just think no one will do the same for me

no one will actually treasure me and put me as their priority

I have bff and bf . But I’m just confused of my importance to them

Also I got a lot of stress from my schoolworks

im going to take the public examination and I have to work extremely […]

It’s been a stressful week. I’ve got bar exams in 3 days and here I am mulling over how my mother has been acting out like a child with a temper tantrum that my friends have been staying away from me. Instead of focusing on our studies we cried it out this afternoon and missed the first 2 hours of lecture. Instead of being stressed with exams, we were stressed with pressure from my own mother. Instead of helping out she was my most pressing problem. Instead of being my support she is a hindrance.

I can’t take it anymore. Her possessiveness is too much. I […]

Reality is boring & LIMITED !! I hate Reality ! boring Reality !
Real life is boring & LIMITED !! I hate real life ! boring real life !
Real world is boring & LIMITED !! I hate real world ! boring real world !

I also hate this life, I hate people / humans (well.. MOST/90% of them), I hate reality, I hate this world.
its very BORING !! and especially nowadays become ONLY very materialistic, money / profits driven only, all about money, money, money, & image, image, image! ; it’s very superficial, shallow, and mundane boring!

Why movies, video games, comics, books, novels, anime/manga, […]

And its days like this where I feel completely alone & unwanted. Theyre all upstairs laughing & cheering each other over a game on their ipads.

I just went up to go to the toilet & he looked up & his face told me to fuck off. Quite literally.

I had so many dreams & aspirations… I just wish my body hadnt betrayed me.

I am reborn into the self I always knew I was deep down. I have shed all of my hang ups. I am no longer pitifully socially anxious. I can talk to anyone and am totally free of mental torment. I have always been good at public speaking actually, even at my most anxious.

I am over-educated and have no desire to go to any more classes. I need to start teaching.

How, where, and about what are the only questions that remain.

Just sharing this, no replies are required.

Ever feel like everything would be okay if you could just climb out of your skin and be the person you were meant to be? I think that I would have been an okay person. Not a Nobel Prize winner, but okay. I’m tired of pretending that I’m okay, tired of wondering what people would think if they knew what was really in my head. My husband deserves a better wife, and my son deserves a better mother, they deserve that person i could have been.

I’ve tried explaining the intrusive thoughts from OCD to someone, they made some awkward joke about OCD and […]