Can I overdose on them?
Which sleeping pills or pills will knock you out for awhile, that you can buy in stores without a prescription?
I want to kill myself and once I’m in the act of doing so, I freeze and I cant? Why can’t I be one of the people that get hit and runned and shot by being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Why can’t I own a gun and place the cold metal barrel to the side of my head and with a slight movement…end it all; for once and for all. Do I pity my mom and feel sorry that all her children bring her disappointed and frustration is that it and ending myself make it hit rock bottom? Im tired and sad, im lonely and unloved and unwanted, im a failure, a worthless and useless piece of shit, im sick in tired of waking up every morning to the thought of wanting to end it all.
Which ways can I obtain anti-depressants?
I came to the Golden Gate today, I had all the time in the world to jump and my hands just couldn’t let me go over the rails. I want to die, I want the end to come, but is it my survival instincts kicking in?
Im about to turn 17 on Dec 11, which is next week. My goal is to commit suicide before my Birthday. It’ll be the best present, I can give myself.
I’ve tried to not give up and started living again, but I come back to my dark side. Fuck this, fuck all of this, it’s not gonna get better, no signs of improvement are showing. I’m destined to be alone and a failure, everybody ignores or leaves me and I’m gonna be a fuck up, I have no hopes, no dreams,they all died along time ago, why am I even pushing further, when I don’t have the will or effort to even do it. Enough is enough, I’m gonna kill myself.
I realized, im not scared to jump off the Golden Gate Bridge, I decide to give life another chance, but everytime I do, I come back 🙁
My dad just called and he knows I cut and he found my rope, he sounded worried
Fuck, I thought my presentation was 5mins, nope it’s 20mins, fuck why do I have to have social anxiety
I’m still feeling lonely, like a failure, and hopeless. I have a big project tomorrow and I have to present for over 5mins and my social anxiety is making me stressed. I tried hanging myself today and I did for about under a minute and I was fighting to breathe, unfortunately I was able to hold up on to a tree with my legs and lift myself up. Before I was to much of *****, but everyday I push myself a bit more.
Just in case if I actually go through with it. This is my chance to say Goodbye to all SP members, have a great life ahead of you. You’re loving and caring people, you’re there for people when nobody else might not be there for him\her
The urge and pain is back. My only way out would be to hang myself (good thing there’s trees around), but im broke right now and I can’t buy the rope. I used to have some, but my parents found it while snooping through my room and they threw it away. I honestly feel like these are my last days on Earth
School is like literally stressing me out and making me feel alone and depressed. I’m not gonna graduate High School, im about a semester behind, my counselor said it already, maybe there is hope for me to graduate, she said, maybe. I’m wasn’t born in the U.S. and I got all the permits from the Dream Act and if I don’t graduate, then they’ll strip them away and throw me back to the country I was born in, although, I was born in Mexico, The U.S. is my home, I was raised here, I came here when I was 4, im 16 now (17 in less than 2 months). My depression and social anxiety makes it hard for me to talk to anyone or even talk in class. I avoid people and when they talk to me, I turn red and I start sweating. I see everyone succeeding and socializing, while I’m lonely and failing. This is supposed to be the easiest part of life, but why is it so damn hard? I feel like I should just end it because I’m struggling in life and I know for sure I will later. I’m not meant for this world, im not fit emotionally or physically.
It sucks being at school seeing everybody happy, in love, socializing or succeeding, while you’re all depressed, broken, lonely, hopeless, and failing
Today might be THE day, wish me luck
When I wake up, I feel darkness surrounding me
When I’m at school, I feel darkness surrounding me
When I’m home, I feel darkness surrounding me
When I’m out with people, I feel darkness surrounding me
At my happiest moments, darkness posses me
Everywhere I go this burden will always be with me til my final day
The darkness doesn’t let the sun rise
Day after day, all I see is pain, misery, sadness, and negativity
I wanna end this life and The Golden Gate Bridge is my only solution. I would try other suicide methods, but heights are on the borderline, im not scared of heights. Why can’t I do it?
I’m sick of being alive and today, I tried to intoxicate myself with water. Fuck, I thought today was my final day. I drank 2 gallons of water in less than an hour, although, I puked once. I felt this strong headache, started feeling dizzy and I had trouble breathing and I laid down on my bed for a bit and passed out. I woke up with pure disappointment on my face, I woke up to find my heart still beating. I don’t have many options for suicide, just this and falling off the Golden Gate , but I hesitate on the bridge. I just can’t take living on this Earth, there’s no hope for me. Everyday, I feel I’m forcing myself to live rather have the desire too.
I wanna kill myself, I have a method by jumping off the Golden Gate, I’ve gone 3 times already, but I can’t seem to do it. I’m scared to jump because of chance of surviving and feeling the agonizing pain, although, the survival ratio is low and also, if I back out, I’ll just make a big scene. Now to why, I wanna do this act. I’ve been depressed for years do to having a dysfunctional family, always being a failure at everything I do; I don’t seem to have a future. A few years passed and I had to move to a new city, which means a new school, new people and a new life. I went there for 2 years then we moved back, where we lived originally, the time I was there I was all alone, I didn’t make a single friend there, I was always alone at break/lunch or in an assignment that required partners or groups. I didn’t feel loved or even cared for by anybody, so I felt who would care if I just disappeared one day. Then one day, I went to visit my aunts and I met this girl; I swear I knew she was the one to be, I just felt this and I haven’t felt that way with anyone else, just by glancing at them for the first time. We started talking and I succeeded into making her mine. It was the first time, I felt cared and loved for by someone else or anyone for that matter. I tried, so hard to make her see that, I am the one and im always the one that will care, protect her, and be by her side through the good and bad. I felt so attached because I actually felt that we had something serious (and we did) we both were attached and in love. That long distance relationship lasted for about almost 4 months. We broke because not one of us got tired of each other or cheated on eachother, but because her didn’t allow us to see eachother anymore (although she didn’t want me with her since the beginning), but we tried to see eachother, when ever we could, unfortunately I had to go back home. We decided we were still gonna try, as much that was needed to make it work. Slowly she started to lose love for me, she would ignore me from time to time and now, we’re not talking anymore. I still have a dysfunctional family and always will, im still a failure, im have no friends, and now im single (it was a miracle, I was with her) I will never have anyone else. So life is shit to me and death is my only solution from this piece of shit, I can a life. My only way is to jump and hopefully in 4 or 5 seconds after I let go of the bridge, I’ll hit the water and shatter my bones and die or stay afloat and feel the unbareable pain or sink and drown.