You think your days are uneventful, and no one ever thinks about you. You think your days are ordinary, and no one ever thinks about you. But we’re all the same, and she can hardly breathe without you.
I started cutting a couple of months ago & I really think I don’t matter on this world. But if I try to commit suicide & I fail WHAT WOULD HAPPEN? I’m scared of fail.. In the other hand I think I need help. So, I don’t know what to do.
Since my relationship crumbled a few weeks ago, I have had this sinking feelingp in the pit of my stomach. I would wake up with it. It’d be with me until I went to bed at night. The only time i could ignore it was at work.
Sometimes, I’d wake up in the morning and cry myself into a vomit session. Worst part about that is not having ingested anything but weed and alcohol for the past 23hours. I’d rather drink than eat. Eating is so hard now but it used to be my favorite thing. Now nothing has taste. I went to bed last night […]
and I thought it is worth sharing. Never heard of Samuel Barber before, but I won’t forget the name now that I have listened to this beauty.
Hi, first time here. English is not my native tongue, so sorry for eventual grammar errors.
I’m just sick of everything. And this is not that old, teenage “everythnig sucks, I’m going to kill myself”. No. I’m goddamned 30 years old and everything sucks and If I could, I would kill myself. But I can’t, It’s just my body reflex to not kill myself even if I really wanted it to. And actually, I don’t want to kill myself but I really don’t see any other option for me. Either that or to feel like shit for decades to come.
So, I’m 30 years old, male, living […]
i have no life and im trying not to fall into depression and suicide and stuff right now. anybody wanna talk about whatever?
Can this pen bring you to me? Pushed away from the freeze…and the long hanging feelings that call out for freedom.
Will this time stand aside, this time took from me just to give it all back again?
Is it right to cry? Is it right to cry for me? Said, this fight might be ours but it all falls to a place that we’ve failed to see.
And so, she lifts me
And so, she lifts me
That’s right, she lifts me now..if you can’t see for yourself..see?
I couldn’t hold back those dreams..cause you were there begging me so nice. And I still […]
These tears I’m wailing,
I spill not without reason.
Remove them, my dearest love.
Take me to the place I’ve been dreaming of,
where the grotesquely lonely
meet the grotesquely lonely
and they whisper,
just very softly,
Please be mine – at least in our afterlife, Dearest Love.
I think there is a song out there to describe just about any situation.
Never will I forget my black diamond, whom I loved so much.. <3
I’m ready. But I’m not in a rush. It’ll probably be soon, though.
I’ll buy a pack of cigarettes that day. I’ll smoke a few and drink some old bourbon when I get home and set up what I need to. Just like the good old days. When I start to get sleepy, that’s when I can go.
No guilt. No stress. No second thoughts. My way. My terms. My comfort.
Sorry this is somewhat long-ish, but I really need help with this?
So, I was going to make an appointment with my doctor sometime this month because I actually want to find out what exactly is wrong with me. Whether I need to been diagnosed with anything else. If I actually have something serious with me. The whole shebang. Because my mood is up and down constantly throughout the day, and no it’s not “just being a teenager”.
I mean, today in my Geography I was in tears walking to the room, and refused to speak to anyone for fifteen minutes. (I’d already had a breakdown in the […]
Suicide is comforting. It provides a real and gritty image in my mind when I look at my life in my right hand and envision committing a violent suicide in my left, I feel a little better about my life. I HATE when people say that suicide is the “easy way out” which is what hurt survivors say– never understanding how hard and how heavy that gun is when you lift it to your waiting mouth and hear the gun click, ready to fire. Those people don’t understand what it’s like to plan your own death for weeks on end every time you leave work, […]
“The obsession with suicide is characteristic of the man who can neither live nor die, and whose attention never swerves from this double impossibility.” – Emile M. Cioran
But still, I hate when I have dreams so vivid and real it’s like I’m seriously there. I could feel everything last night in my one particular dream. Feeling the slice and stab of the knife as I tried defending myself. That after-the-fact pain, the bleeding. I could see the bleeding. It was so real, the way it seeped down my side and soaked into my shirt. I strangely enjoyed that.
Self harm withdrawal? Medication side effects? A combination of both? Who knows.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VjTG21T8aU
Have you ever felt so ugly and unwanted, that you couldn’t leave the house? You feel as if everyone is staring at you, wondering why you look this way instead of that way. I worry about that every day, and it’s gradually getting worse. I can’t leave the house most days. I haven’t always hated my appearance, it became noticable when I began to truly notice my appearance. I’m 13, and I have alopecia. During the summer, my hair started to get noticably thinner and now it’s almost completely gone. My mother thought it’d save my confidence if we just shaved it all- which in […]
Black bass. Black race. The gothic empire, the last in dire. The devour, of all, has settled. The sound of the new age, before, the march of the horse. The next one thousand years. Evolve me. To fight back. To die for it. The predecessors have all been taken. Tears and love, Princess Diana. The cannon. The lion. The sabre of light; the ultimate hope. You, too. Now we know, a group of killer narcissist does not want to lose control. Pig-head monsters. I am the undertaker, call me the stone cold stunner. We will go right under. […]
Hey y’all. I’ve been a long time lurker and just decided to make an account. Reading some of the things here seems to help me sleep at night and reminds me that there’s always an alternative to life.
My title to this post is tired of life and that statement couldn’t be any truer for me right now. Fourth of July just past and I celebrated it with my blood relatives, relatives and their friends. The party was at my aunts house and she has a pool and yard for fireworks. Many people would be excited to enjoy the beautiful day out in the sunshine, […]
I’m starting to feel that burden of being all alone.
I don’t even know where to begin anymore..
Without that other person, it’s hard to understand where exactly I’ve been all these years..who have I been?
Will I ever really be whole again?